my heart will shatter into pieces.

2009-10-21T17:01:00.001+08:00

heyyo :)

2009-05-01T03:53:00.000+08:00

Actually, i wanted to post some pictures here because veryveryvery few or maybe none reads anymore.

But then i cant find the connector.

So too bad.

2008-01-17T22:05:00.001+08:00

new blog ! (:
www.sourplainmelody.blogspot.com

blog reopen

2008-01-17T19:14:00.000+08:00

hahaa, i know i'm fickle minded.
but anyways,
away with those tears & emotions,
its weird, why i heal so fast,
am i ?

i dont know, perhaps its all a facade ?
its time i should get over him.

i will, & i must !
enough of crying for now & today, no more crying !

melissa you shant be emo & cry anymore !
treasure who loves youuuu!

that shall be my new year's resolution :D

yay! GO MELISSA!

blog closed ?

2008-01-16T22:42:00.001+08:00

to close or not close down my blog, i prolly should, my life's fucked up enough.

campppppp

2008-01-16T20:57:00.000+08:00

haha, camp's alright yeah people ?
hollyyyy,
just now while i was talking to him,
he was like,
" hey brb, i'll go sms my girlfriend "
i was like, " wthh.. "
then i was like " who, tell me "
he's like " my classmate, some girl, she's really nice "
i was like " omgomgomgomggomgomg, "
then silence,
then he's like,
" melissa, i'm kidding la, its so fun to play with you "
i was so relieved can!

he's now studying biology,
lets hope he scores really well :)

i'm bored ,
this is so freaking weird,

i've realised something,
we dont always get what we want in life.
in fact, we get what we dont want in life.

i dont know anything for now,
all i know is,
i want to study well,
do what i need to do.
& continue liking him.
hopefully something might happen.
but nooo,
some stupid things happen & nothing goes well.

him1, him2 and him3.
3 different guys btw.

like whatever uh.
how can i make any decisions when i like him1 alot alot ?
so yeah, sorry but its like this for the time being.
i'm sorry if i did hurt anyone,
i really am.

MALIAH,
thanks babe, for being there for me always, i love you (:

KHENG,
thanks ah kor, for comforting me when i'm down, me thank you :)

HAIKAL,
thanks abg, for being there for me whenever i'm feeling down, me thank you (:

AMANI,
thanks dudette, for comforting me all the time :)

HADI,
boy thanks for all that comforting you did :) really appreciate it :D

MARIA,
girrl, thank you for being my best friend since 2005 :D i love you :D

GWEN,
darling cousin, me love you :D:D thanks for being my bestest cousin! (:(:

MIA, NO MORE

2008-01-16T12:04:00.000+08:00

abseiling :D
this was how high it was, 3 storeys or so high ?
raj, like me, got stuck there too.

okay people,
the secondary 2 crestians are back from camp, finally !
we started monday with our own groups, planning how to hike our way to bukit timah hill.
then after that we headed to dairy farm adventure camp.
it was creepy at first, thinking how we had to spend our 3 days & 2 nights in a remoted area.
then after that, we had lunch & then we went for our expedition at bukit timah hill.
turns out we already have a designated map, just to see how we find our way up.
2/7 didn get to go though, there was a thunder storm approaching.
then came back & had some snacks before going for the blind-folded walk,
seriously funn, Ganesh was our illumnaii ( sp )

i was freaking scared so i grabbed anything i could feel, poor ganesh ended up with scratches on his arm, sorry !
then we had dinner with the rest of the classes & then went for the night walk at about 7.30+
golly i swear its fucking scary.
it wasn the typical type of night walk, it was a walk inside the jungle !
had to walk in a single file, so adli then azlin then me then nabil.
the 4 besties walked together.
then it got really dark, azlin got really scared she started crying.
i was shivering cold shit man, binxiang comforted me, thanks binxiang :)

then came back at about 9+
ate & bathed and all, first time bathing in a guys toilet -.-
with azlin & crystal, it was utterly so embarrassing.
like what you have , we also have, that thing ??
then got dressed & went to sleep,
cried to sleep though, because there was something bothering me.

then the next day, woke up early & changed & all,
breakfast was nice & then we went to the obstacles course.
first we did abseiling. ( top picture )
it was to teach us how to come down safely & fast.
then next up, we did rope course.
wasn that scary because there was ropes to hold on.
the next was rock-climbing,
rather hard because of the curves & alll, pathetic la.
we all went for lunch after that though.

after lunch we went back to the obstacles course & did challenge rope.
sadly i was sitting in front of the instructor,
& did i mention, mr san told him to put me high high -.-
then i was the demostrator can ! was freaking scared cos i was first..
( top picture with raj in it )

then i climbed to the top already, the same position as Raj, then i got really really scared.
ask my classmates how much i cried & begged the instructor to let me climb down,
but NOOOO, he didn let me.
i had to sit on the about 25 cm apart metal thingy only, looking down made me cry even more.
then i was like, 1..2..3 jump!
then i pushed myself off, & i cried even more.
i've never felt so scared, like my heart was coming out already, i was so super relieved to be on the floor, the nice floor.

then Chia Thong accompanied me to the toilet, golly my eyes were swollen like fcuk !
after that i saw others do the same thing, surprisingly , none of the rest were like me, none cried, none shouted, just me -.-
i feel utterly pathetic can.
instructor name was : Mint, haha, cool name.
then i was helping him belay those players while Maliah was the supporter.

it was rather fun, & then there was illumnaiis called Yi Kang, Mahir, Salleh, Ganesh and more.
all guys BTW, ahaha, then at night we were busy copying this thingy, bronze award NYAA thingy.
just came home, fcuking tired !
want to go get some sleep already,
nights world.

what am i supposed to think or do now ?
i am independant, i will be.
but you dont know, there are times,
when we girls have our softer side.
i'm still waiting alright.
i care about anything,
anything concerning you.
prolly i'm just a toy to you.
a toy, a normal toy.
i dont know.
everything's a blur.

4th post for the day

2008-01-13T21:43:00.000+08:00

4th post for the day.
pathetic i know !
today's so boringgggg.
packed the camp stufff.
i tell you i'm being so uptight.
but dont know why, i just am.
fuckkk me !

godd kill me.
i'm having a fever :(
sickening la !
come at this time.

i hateeee myself cannn!

why am i such a fucking fool.
whyy ?!
first you tell me you have a certain liking for me.
now you say you absolutely have no feelings towards me.
why am i such a fucking fool to actually believe everythingggg !?!?!?!??!?!?!?
melissa,
you should just fucking go and diee,
stick your head somewhere & cry for fuck's sake.

i hate myself, to the utter core.
to think i was so naive.
thought everything was picking up.
thought everything was going to be smooth sailing, or something near.
but nooo, it was fucking stupidity on my part.
i trusted what you said.
i trusted everything you said,
& now you crush them all once again.
you think its easy let go ?
you think so ?
its nott!
ugh forget it okay.
its always like this,
you built up that confidence in me,
& then here you come crushing it again.
it hurts so badly,
i want to hide somewhere for now.
k.
melissa is fucking crying.

2008-01-13T17:47:00.001+08:00

i want this bag cannnnnnnnn! dadddyyyyy buyyy for meee pleaseeeee.

about 8" x 10" x 2.75" (W x H x D)

made of fine nylon & pvc

water proof

1 pcs

mint condition; never been used

i love anything that is RED or has elmo in it or anything sweeet :)

back from shopping.

2008-01-13T16:01:00.000+08:00

elmo is love :)
i dont know why, i look so blurr man.

iam back from shoppinggg !
first me & maliah went to KFC to grab some quick & very ardious lunch.
we saw this 2 guys, so funny, tell me who puts their ciggs on their ears ?
look like some coffee shop uncle can !

i was laughing really madlyyy,
then after that we went to bata to get maliah's shoes,
then went to ice-lemon tee, to choose someone's present.
but next week then we're buying.
then bought me darlinggg elmooo, omgomgomg, its sooo cutee can!

haha then we walked aboutt shop shop.
then went to NTUC to get my stufff & all.
but couldn find them, so decided to walk to central to buy them.
bought my rafiaaa sttring already then bought battery for the dear torch.
then after that, me & maliah went to get some bubble teaaa,
then she sent me homeee,
before taking the bus home :)
i love my maliahhh :D

he's having a bad day again.
i dont know how to cheer him up,
boy, you know i'm here for you,
always, & i really hope that you would at least, open up.
like you said last night,
bottling up your feelings would make people feel awful.
so dont bottle up your feeling can ?
you dont know how much i'm worried about you.
you dont know how much i care for you,
you have no idea.
boy, please, you have me, as a good friend.
i'll do anything, just to see you smile.
thats how much i care.
even liking you, makes me turn into a idiot,
i dont mind.
i'm already one.
now you're out with your friends doing a literature project,
i miss you so.
hope you have a good day & stop being emo or have any bad days from no on, okays ?
smile boy :)
too bad i'm sticking with you.
i'm worse than a super glue.
dont try pushing me away,
i cant push myself away from you either.
we're good friends aren't we ?
imy!

nightmares >;|

2008-01-13T10:34:00.000+08:00

i hate hate hate hate hate nightmares i tell you !
first he was having nightmares, so he woke up consecutively.
then he went to sleep already, i went to sleep.
couldn be bothered staying up to do anything,
since i'm supposed to meet maliah today like in 5 minutes at her house there,
so we go shopping for our camp stuff.
so semangat i know.

then this morning,
i had this really really bad nightmares,
all of a sudden, i dont know why.
i recently didn get any nightmares seyhh.
then i dreamt of this 2 kidnappers,
calling me a slut & a whore,
then slapped me & kept me & my friends in a dark enclosed area.
at first i had my torch, so it was alright.
then after that it died on me,
so i screamed like shit.
then i kept hearing footsteps & high-pitched screamingggg!!
then i kicked whatever that came to me,
& so i kicked my bedside,
my foot hurts :(

it was seriously scary i tell you.
i dont know why i dreamt of this type of things.
do they mean anything ?

today

2008-01-12T23:47:00.000+08:00

tuning in to.
gone so young
by amber pacific.
simply gorgeousss :)

I never dreamt it'd be this way
I've lost any chance for me to say
To say that I miss you, say that I love you
Will someone please tell me I'm okay

I wasn't prepared for what's to come
A life made of memories gone so young
And now I'm regretting all I've done
But in your heart know that I'm with you all along

Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
I'm in your heart tonight

I never thought that this could go
And take me away from all I know
And leave me to think I'm on my own
But your love will take me, you were the one...

...Who sat through nights
You held me tight
And made sure I'm okay
And I thank you for the love you gave to me

Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
I'm in your heart tonight...

Tonight...

Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
And if I should fall, I know you're waiting
And if I should call, I know you're there
If ever you cry just know
I'm in your heart tonight...
I'm in your heart tonight.

i dont know why i cry when i hear thiss..,
melissa you're so unpredictable!

anyways, today was guitar class & tuitions.
had to meet bryan at white sands to pass him his music file because he left it in gwen's bag.
& gwen went back to perth already, so it was stuck at my place.
but yeah,
then came home & chatted with him on msn.
went for tuition & something happened.
i got really perked up & in turn, didn concentrate for tuition :(
tell me i should stick my head down a hole.
hahah.

its like this, why did i like wait until the whole day,
so happy, but uhh, nevermindd.
hopefully he could call sometime soon.
really hope sooooo.

listening to amber pacific,
over & over again,
somehow it reflects how i feel about everythingggg.
first heard the song from gwen's ipod classic.
then noww, haikal sent me the song.
so yeahs.
& i have bleeding love too.

i love both songs, like i seriously do.
maliah's computer is finally healthy again! (:
threee cheers for sweet smiles !
hahaha

sleeping soon, i'm having a really really bad headache >;|
why come at this time !?!
urghh.

okay, nights people.
i really should smile even more & stop being a crazy ass.

happy 220th post (:

2008-01-11T21:51:00.000+08:00

happy 220th post, as i said above :)
omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg
as you can seee, i'm super duper uper spastic now.
because because, today for the very first time in what, 5 months, no wait 6 months since i know him, & liked him, he called me on the phoneeeeee.
its seriously the first timeeeee!
i was hyperventilating, for the very first time oke!

he says i've got a accent, do i ?
he says i do, but i dont think so.
haha, && he enjoys talking to me :)
he sounds so cute on the phone can,
like seriously hotttt, & it kinda melted me :)

gollyyy, wait wait, i'm so not obssessing oke!
its just that i'm really surprised,
like really surprised.
i thought he wanted to call me, because he wanted to tell me something bad, didn think he was calling just to ask if i was alright,
awww.

& i guess my reaction was really weird, cos while on the phone with him,
i was scratching this metal thing, until scrapes of metal peeling were on my fingers.
that was my reaction, over i know.

i still freaking cant believeeeee,
he sounds so awesomely cuteee & gorgeouss :D
i'm glad he called me, because i know i wont have the courage to do so :P
i tried asking him beforee, but he said prepaid low or something.
haha.

today must be the best day alive, YET.
hahaha.

anways, finally its the weekends.
how i miss my darling computer, on the verge of growing fungus because i haven touched it much.
& its the level camp on monday to wednesday, tell me people, how am i supposed to survived ?!
& it'll be at the MOE dairy farm,
heard its haunted..
zomgzomgzomgzomg.

i'm going to pack a super duper big big big bag for it.
i dont care, everything i'll bring.
everything, perhaps i'm going to bring on of my teddys too :)
i know i'm childish, but tell me, who aint childish at heart ?
i am, proud of that too :D

fridays are normally the best because the entire day we just slack, cos art, then eng & then DNT, thats all, & after that with the super duper uper boring maths tuition.
so yeah, but overall, rating for today,
4.5 stars :D

I'M SO SO SO BORED,
daddy was watching supernatural just a while ago, i got scared,
haha.
& i stayed back in school today to watch maliah become the belayers.
its for camp btw, they have to learn how to support people to push them to high areas.
heard from haikal, when hes time for camp, there was a girl who broke her leg because his friend wasn heavy enough to support her weight.
well, thinking about that, i think i might be a little scared.

&& btwbtwbtw,
ever heard of doing projects doing camp ?!
i have a english project oke !
but with chia thong, bin xiang, joshua and aizat.
i'm the photographer :):)
then chia thong's the editor,
aizat's the writer.
so the rest is up to bin xiang and joshua to choose.
our topic is meal times :D
yay, i guess its going to be good :D

&&&&&&&& i'm scaredddd.
someone call me at night to chat with me cannnnnn
pleasepleasepleaseee.
i'm doing night duty :( :( :( :(

i'm scared !

aftermath

2008-01-08T20:44:00.000+08:00

today i did something extraordinary.
i did my homework, i paid attention in class, i'm extra nice to mommy & daddy.
funny thing, i want casholaaaaaa.
i'm not say broke la, because i'm not, but who wouldn feel better with more casholaaa in their wallets ?
i am so bored, today class was super good, because its the first time, without a teacher, we did our homework in silence, wait, no in silence, but pretty much close to that. and then everyone passed them up !
and wait, shit, i haven done my science workbook corrections -.-
& then, my chinese book review.
& then what.. geography !
god, & then today mr ong told us about this guy, he was simply awesome babe.
he's simply so mind-blowing ! i'm like flabbergasted. he's like without limbs and all. but yet he has the courage to carry on with life, kudos to him.

NICK VUJICIC.

sometimes i already feel pathetic, & feel like my life's awful & all.
thinking back, i dont know i have, i didn know how to appreciate what i have.
he, has no limbs, no nothing, but yet, he is determined to carry on with his life, leading it to the best of his abilities, i'm simply speechless.
its so pathetic, thinking back, how i felt everything, scoldings, quarrels & special friendships goes awry & i start whining, complaining about how shitty my life is, comparing mine & his, i realise, i'm really much better off, in terms of life, i'm far much better.
i have friends who love me, i have friends who hate me, i have people who critises me, but i dont get bullied.

melissa, be contented.

Nick, he fought for his rights, he was determined, maybe its that determination i should hold on to as well, towards everything.

determine to like him no matter what happens.
determine to improve everything
determine to be myself, always.

pictures to keep you happy (:

2008-01-08T20:13:00.000+08:00

this is the jocie guo i'm telling you about. she's cute isnt she ? she's from my primary school (: && she has really skinny legs, oh, HOW ENVIOUS !
fine i admit i did pose for this shot, ahaha, then again, who doesn pose ? & thats my elmo present from shafiq ! (:
" up your imagination.. " haha, & thats the pretty nadiah from 2/1 ! (:
thats me, in school uniform, in maliah house, in maliah's room, with maliah's mirror :D
thats me & maliah, my darling bestieeeee ! :}:}:}

2008-01-06T21:15:00.000+08:00

[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i dont need you to stand me
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
who cares anyways
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you changed like so fucking much
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i dont know you anymore
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you said to people you cant stand me
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i dont need that
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i can be on your nerves.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
got think you're on mine too.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
wel you're on my nerves too
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
dont think of the world just you & yourself
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
erm
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
if u were once my fren
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
if so, you might as well go join a private school
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
wen i change
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u shld tell me
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
n nt continue with this thing
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i did fucking tell you
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
wen?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you didn want to fucking listen
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
long ago.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
last year.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
tt was last year
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
how abt this year
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u shld know how stubborn n i
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
m*
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
its not a matter of being stubborn
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
its you
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you're changing
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
not the stubborness.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u shld haf told me
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
I DID FUCKING TELL YOU
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
stubborness is apart of me.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
hello ?! did you read the messages ?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
erm...
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u shld haf told me earlier
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
n im trying to change one by one
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
I FUCKING TOLD YOU LAST YEAR
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
YOU'RE NOT EVEN CHANGING AT ALL
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
yes i am
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
i gt another prob ok
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
YOU'RE GETTING WORSER
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
yes tts true
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
LIKE WHO CARES ! YOU'RE MAKING OUR LIFE FUCKING HELL
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
reli?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
then step out of it
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i'm already fucking out of it
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
I'M STANDING UP FOR THEM NOW
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ohk
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
& THOSE WHO YOU TREAT LIKE FUCK
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
fine
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
then dont chat with me lar cn?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
DO I FUCKING SOUND LIKE I'M CHATTING WITH YOU ?!
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
no
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
WAKE UP.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
already m
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
YOU CAN FUCKING GO TELL EVERYONE YOU DID NOTHING
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
BUT YOU KNOW YOU DID, YOUR CONSCIENCE WILL HAUNT YOU DOWN
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
reli?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
maybe urs too will haunt u down
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
haunt me for hwta ?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
*what
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
haunt me for standing up to you & pointing out everything ?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i think i fucking did a right thing !
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ok den
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u shld haf told me nicely
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
n i will treat u nicely
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
hello !? i tried being nice ! but what? i got called behind the back ? why in the world would i be so stupid again to treat you nicely
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
well
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
& why the fuck would i talk to you nicely now when your'e being hypocritical ?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
who strated it first
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ahahaha
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ya tts rite
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you're simply shameless.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
oh ya
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
i seriously forgotten abt tt
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
slut.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
oh yea
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
im a slut
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
a whore
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
a flirt
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
anymore else?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
thats so correct, i'm so happy that you actually realised.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
YAY!!!
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
GO ME!!
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you realised i'm not even laughing.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
reli?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
then u shld
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
why the fuck would i laugh ?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
how wld i knoe
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
AHAHAHAHAHAAHA
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
no shame man.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
no shame
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i pity you
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
dont need
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
cuz im proud of it
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
yeah ? you should despise yourself then
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
y?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
its up to me
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
haf u heard tt phrase
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
it IS up to you.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
but not up to YOU when it involves everyone else.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
get it ?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ahahah
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
no
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
cuz im a moron
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
remember?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
thickskin.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
no
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
i wonder why he is so blind
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
im quite thin actually
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
he is
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u dunno meh
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
yeah blind to have steaded with you.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ya.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
i agree much
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
blind to not see the THIS YOU
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ya
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
lyk hakim steaded with u
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
hey you know what, you can go on acting dumb & whatsoever.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
YAY!!!!
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
we all know you're a slut through & through
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you can deny to know that yourself
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
everybody knows tt
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
yea i cld
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
good that you know.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ya.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
im proud of it
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
remember?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u gt a bad stm man
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
seriously, i'm not fucking giving a damn if i've nb cb stm
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
stop acting as if you know nothing
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
okay, fuck it.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ok
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
im nt dumb
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u want me to act clever
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
this how it goes
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
fuck la ! you lead your fucking life, dont fucking involve her,
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
she's had enough of your nonsense.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ok
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
fine
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u cn haf her
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
i dont mind
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
she's NOT a fucking TOY
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you dont say have her
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ok
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
she cn hate me
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
dont you fucking insult her.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
i nvr insult her
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
whatever.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you did.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ok den
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
insult
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you refered her as a tyo
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
*toy
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
no i didnt u did
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
dont fucking give that bullshit.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
u said toy first
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
dont act dumb
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
please,
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ok
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
go to everyone & bitch about me, turn them against me, i dont give a fuck !
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
did i say i wanna do tt?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you always do
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
no need to say
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
reli?
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ahahahaha
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ya i forgotten abt tt thing too
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you forgot about everything
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ya
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M YOUR EMOTIONLESS SUCKER.[/c] says:
you wont have much true friends.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M YOUR EMOTIONLESS SUCKER.[/c] says:
seriously.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ohk
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
so?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M YOUR EMOTIONLESS SUCKER.[/c] says:
nothing, just typing it out for YOU to see.
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ohk
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
ty
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
for the advice
SHE SAYS/ TALK :
appreciate it loads.

am i bitchy ? i think i am.

forget it mans.
he's in so much troubles,
i should just shut up.
i cant even help him feel better.
i feel so useless.
what can i do !
rawr, i hate myself being like this.
i want to help you so badly,
but yet i cant :(
i'm so uselesss.
& i seriously, want to be there for you, no matter what happens.
i will, i'll try my best (:
trust me.

bleahhsss

2008-01-06T18:03:00.000+08:00

forget it all.
i'm going to try forgetting the fact that i liked you.
i'm going to try everything.
melissa, youre such a ass.

i hate myself for being melissa.
i hate myself not being able to let go at all.
i hate myself for being so stupid.
i hate myself for not being able to forget everything.
i hate myself for being such a bitch.

i hate this.

someone please wake me up.

the thing

2008-01-06T17:52:00.000+08:00

alright, so she said sorry.
if she apologizes to them, i'm alright with it.
i'm fighting for their rights.

2008-01-06T13:02:00.000+08:00

SHE SAYS / TALK :
sry if it insults u so much
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
its not me
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
its YOUR friends.
SHE SAYS / TALK :
sry bt i gt no tym
SHE SAYS / TALK :
im just kidding
SHE SAYS / TALK :
too bad if they are too sensitive
SHE SAYS / TALK :
i will apologise ok
SHE SAYS / TALK :
SRY
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
its not a matter of being senstive.
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you just dont get it do you ?
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
you think everything cn be kidding ?
SHE SAYS / TALK :
ok fine
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
there's still a limit
SHE SAYS / TALK :
i know ok
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
if you dont know
[c=14] MELISSA, I'M SELF-DISTRUCTIVE.[/c] says:
go ask YOUR bf to teach you
SHE SAYS / TALK :
sry i gtg now
SHE SAYS / TALK :
bye

this is shit, why say you're kidding ?
i suggest you go check up the dictionary or ask your BOYFRIEND, whats the extend of kidding/joking.
eh wait, dont, ask your mom instead, i bet she can offer much more better reason than your BOYFRIEND because your BOYFRIEND kept on saying people stingy eyh. wtf la !
not everything can be done with a " i'm sorry. "
you dont know how much you hurt your friends, you dont know what all these is about actually.
i'll show you, i'll prove to you have inside you're insensitive ! not them being sensitive.
why not i come over to you & comment about everything you do ?
no wait, not enough impact,
your BOYFRIEND coming over to you, & commenting on everything you do, everything you say, however you walk and all !
can you imagine that pain ? its how you treat them.

our class is full enough of this political shit, dont add them in.

stereotypes

2008-01-05T23:24:00.000+08:00

talking about this again.
i'm really mad at this.
you know who you are, if you happen to read my blog, please get ready for whatever i'm shooting to you.

you, time and time i just turned a blind eye.
but what, you take it all for granted.
why in the world did you have to say that to them ?
being in ncc doesn give you the right to go insult their cca right.
they are your friends you know ?
some are even your best friends.
did you even think how they would have felt ?
what, putting the signboard on their chest means showing off their boobs.
please, you dont have any rights to say that.
you aint some big shot, so keep your damn prejudicism to yourself.
you hurt your own best friend, you made her cry.
how could you ? i actually didn even wanted to bother telling you all these.
but what ? you hurt my best friends, theres no reason why i shouldn be standing up for them.
you take advantage of the fact that they are kind & sweet,
push them around like some ball, treat them as toys.
have you ever considered how they would have felt ?
you're just playing with their feelings, their friendship with you.
you're hypocritical, on the outside, act as if you're so chummy with me,
but inside you tell your bf how much you hate me.
& i wanna bet 6849813068461 dollars, you're going to say.
you did nothing, so i cant say anything.
i'm standing up for my friends this time round, no more turning a blind eye.
when you want them, you act chummy with them, when you dont, you treat them as toys, free to give away.
HELLO ?!?!?! they are humans ! not some toys who has no feelings nor emotions !
dont think just because you have the backup fo your boyfriend, i'll shut up.
because you can be 100% assured, i wont shut up this time round.
& hello !? you have no right to despise others, no right to critise about their cca alright !
so what if they cant march ?! no big deal ! you dont fucking march in class do you?
you're pushing your limits, just because no one stands up to tell you all these,
doesn mean we're mute, we have our limits too.
you have no right to comment on whether people want to show off their boobs or not alright,
because simply, you are nothing, no one.
unless you can prove with scientific evidence that you are somehow blood related to them, shut up.
& yesterday, so what if i was looking at him, you mean i dont have the rights to look at him ?
then tell me why you have the rights to look at YOUR boyfriend ?
it simply makes no sense.
you can push others around, but i tell you, definitely not me.
i wont get pushed around & keep quiet after that.
SHUT UP OKE!
i'm standing up to you today, i hope you read this, & please, wake up.
today you shouted at your own best friends, insulting their cca, even if it was a joke, that was really too much, YOU MADE YOUR FRIENDS CRY ALRIGHT?!?!
dont think i'm not refering to you, because i am.

PLEASE HAVE SOME RESPECT FOR OTHERS IF NOT YOURSELF CAN !

school life -.-

2008-01-05T18:54:00.000+08:00

school started like what, 4 days ago ? & i'm here whining about having the holidays back already.
secondary 2 is so much more stressful than last year, where we were still innocent little secondary 1s.
here's to list.

Literature, Ms Kamath
Maths & Home Tutor, Ms Olivia Low
English, Ms Sharon Lam
Art, Mr Ling
MT, Wu Qi
Science, Mrs Jennifer Neo
Geography, Mrs Tan Boon Yen
DNT, Mr Halid.

& Chairman is Azhar.
& Vice Chairman is Khairiyana.
Class commitee, not much of a change.

First day, quite slackish, & then the homework starts pilling in one by one, wait, let me change my statement, many by many.
And i just realised, i have alot of undone holiday assignment left undone ! What ? i'm like supposed to have done them in the holidays but nooo, i didn, & so i have to finish them now.
The classrooms position changed, now 2/7 is taking last year 2/2's classroom i think.
Its rather stuffy, considering we are near to the toilet, but thank god, we have 2/9 beside us ! (:
One thing sadly, is that odd numbers are on one side, & even numbers on the other, cant even look up at all.

I'm bored, i'm reading The Giver, golly, i'm sick & down with the fever and all. I need to find a " Angels & Airwaves ", I-Empire album! GODD. ITS OUT OF STOCK FOR NEARBY! THE NEAREST IS LIKE, WHAT, AT VIVO OR WHAT ??
puck thatttt.
okay, thats all.

i wonder how he is getting along.
i actually miss him
when i see him keeping all his problems by himself, i feel sad.
i want to be there for him, like if he has any problems, he could tell me about them.
but no, he tend to keep things to himself.
thats why i like him,
he's different from other guys.
he is very different,
he's weak inside, & he bottles things up.
for other guys, they dont, its like a normal thing for them to tell everyone.
they have this thing, to think, violence solves, no it doesn.
well, i miss the old happy him (:

HAPPY NEW YEAR !

2008-01-01T17:24:00.000+08:00

happy new year people !
last night countdown was a blast !
since had a chalet, decided to hang around,
went to the lan shop to blog & all,
then walked to the park with karkheng, liangxian, shirley & xinying.
the boys scared me alot, so i ran to maria's house,
sadly, we both got scared of each other -.-
then her mom spray dyed my hair, many fucking different colours, ahaha.
thank you loads aunty!
then maria got her hair sprayed too!
went down to downtown back to get spray cans.
stefanie's brother, Jin Hao was with us so we all bought cans too :)
& here comes the fun part :p
maria, i & jinhao got sprayed like fuck & it was seriously yucky to have all those spray stuff in your face, no air to breath, no nothing, shit. RAWR.
& we then went into D' Marqueeeeee
it was Jocie Guo singing some chinese songs first.
& loads of die hard fans were like screaming " wo ai ni meimei ! " meaning i love you.
& some guys, my age i think, was like chasing like fuck just to get the autographed balloons by her, & what he did ? he pushed & stepped & whacked people just to get to touch the balloons.
i was fucking pissed at him, for pushing me until i almost hit the ground, i fucking stepped on him foot, like really hard, then he said " something something, bitch "
all i said was " nb la, fuck off "
then he didn come near me already, ahaha, what a shit.
then countdown was awesome, but not much of dancing together.
12-3 was techno nonstop i think, left already by then, had alot of fun spraying people.
saw alot of people too.
then went to meet John & Shafiq.
got sprayed by people AGAIN.
this time it was a really hard one, cos 5 people came running after me & maria just to spray us, we got our butts shit.
decided to go back chalet to bath & all.
then came out again.
followed Shafiq & John, but i couldn get into Platinium Lounge cos i was underaged -.-
felt fucking bad because, because of me, Shafiq & the rest had to sit outside.
went back to the chalet instead, because didn feel well.
so yeahs, slept until this morning.
RAWR,
came home & slept more.
i feel like a pig, ahaha.
just woke up actually.
ahahaha.
* happy new year *

2008

2007-12-31T19:46:00.000+08:00

yo 2008 !
its going to come in a matter of a few hours !
& dear melissa is at downtown east, inside the lan shop.
using the poor computer which has to be typed fast.
ahaha, poor computer.
2008 yo,
i made a new friend today,
Joseph, ! (:
holy innocents high.
14
ahaha, fuck it, shafiq is not in downtown yet,
& john is somewhere in downtown.
-.-
fuck it hard.
my last post for the year ! (:(:
fuck it.
WISH EVERYONE A HAPPY NEW YEAR !

whats with lifeeeeeeeeee

2007-12-27T20:19:00.000+08:00

call me anything you want.
i'm shit for life.
i've done my DNT assignment already,
i've been doing my chinese homework.
prev 2 post, going to be edited.

pictures, finally !

2007-12-27T14:42:00.000+08:00

BEHOLD my two pretty ladies, ! :P
the cousins ! :O
i was about to kiss casy's hands, ahaha.
east coast baby !
gwen & our grandaddy :D:D
Me & my granddaddy.
my grandaddy :)
we all look funny. whoohoo!
gwen's oreao cheesecake, awesome !
my delicious chocolate fudgeeeee :D:D
me & pretty gwen, those aunties are like posing too, ahaha.
we're the dramaaaaaa peoplee ! (:

update finally !

2007-12-25T09:44:00.000+08:00

TRACKBACK, 21-25 dec.
21 december 2007

boring day, gwen went to sentosa for her photo shoot,
& when she came home, she looked like a little super tanned kid,
haha, & she complained of pain, so superlotion goes to the rescueee.
she went out for dinner with one of her friends,
& he did something that made her cry like fuck.
so yeah, that jerkassssss.

22 december 2007

gwen & i went to century square to get gwen's nails done AGAIN.
ahaha, then i went for guitar class & gwen went to meet up with iman, her good friend.
guitar class was shit, so much stuff i didn know how to play nor strum, teacher got frustrated with me :x
then went for tuition which was shit again, then came home & met gwen,
night time went out to eat eat eat :D:D
oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELLY TAN.

23rd december 2007

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YENSOON !
then, gwen went to eat coast with Lisa, her best friend.
& then came home already, went to go eat at like 10+
went over to Tricia's house, because gwen needed to take her stuff back from her house.
then gwen met her friends, while i was supposed to go to benedict's house at 11
but in the end didn go because his dad was still awake, couldn go until 12.40+
by then too late already, so stayed home.
was sitting at the corridor for 45 minutes just waiting for benedict to call me, so that i could go over.
AHAHA.

24 december 2007

far out, my best days alive !
woke up at like, 1+
then talked on the phone with some guy asking about xiangli -.-
i dont even know this guy call Zachary, some sec 4 siglap sec guy.
then we went to century square & tampines mall.
shopped around, & gwen did her toe nails this time round,
then bought a wallet, a pair of long black tights, exchanged my espirit dress,
gwen bought a pair of shoes, a zinc bag, and alot more.
we did our neos, but sadly, they are MISSING.
shittttttttttt, $20 worth of neos GONE !?!?!
ugh, cant be bothered searching for them anyways.
then went to this japenese restaurant to eat with daddy & mummy & gwen.
then rushed home to get dressed & went for swimming.

awesome night ever.
made 3 new friends.
Shafiq, 22 years old, pretty old, very friendly.
John, 18 years old, lifeguard on duty yesterday night.
& Derrick, 20 years old i think, haha swimmers.

cold but fun, & then very creepy so yeah.
got teamed with syafiq to compete with gwen & john for some games.
such like ; horseriding, piggy backing, & alot more.
then had alot of fun, took some photos as well, but i look really crappy because i was wet.
AHAHA, best night far out, dang, melissa shut the hell up.
then gwen & i decided to go, so we 4 left together, gwen went to meet her friends &
i followed shafiq & john to central to eat when last minute gwen came along,
had alot of fun arguing who to pay, cos shafiq wanted to treat us all, but it was really awkward.
in the end, half half, wadakakaa.
oh yes, at tampines mall, saw sabila, said hi, she looked really pretty AS ALWAYS ! (:

then me & gwen went home,
after that came out again.
i met shafiq & john again,
& then gwen went to meet her friends to chill at McCafe.
no lights, no one around, and just the moonlight + the pool water sound.
shafiq was missing for a while, turns out he went to get some chocolates.
& he bought me a heart shaped box chocolate.
i was so surprised, THANK YOU SHAFIQ !
then we chilled under the moonlight & listened to music, while the 3 of us started chatting about people we know & all.
then finally had to go :(
john sent me down to the carpark & then gwen's friends sent us home.
AT 4+ in the morning, then helped gwen pack her luggage for her flight back home today.

awww, i'm so going to miss gwen :(
& shafiq says he's goinna teach me wakeboarding, ahaha, he's a surfer :D:D
how cool is that ! (:
after sending gwen at the airport, i'll prolly go to tanah merah to meet haikal.
we are going down to orchard, haha, to see the christmas deco or something.
golly i'm excited !

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL !
& christmas this year is special because i celebrated it with 2 new awesome guy friends & gwen ! (: & not forgetting, the privellage to get to have the entire pool
to just the 4 of us, the FIRST TIMERS !
awesomelest awesome night & christmas, THANK YOU GUYS FOR MAKING IT SPECIAL !

HARI RAYA HAJI

2007-12-20T17:13:00.000+08:00

hello people.
before i say anything,
SELAMAT HARI RAYA HAJI !

i'm super bored, can someone talk to me, on msn or on the phone ?
anythinggggg pleaseee.
yesterday went out with gwen after tuition to go visit granddaddy,
spent around 2 hours or so with him,
pictures in gwen's phone, will upload tonight or something.
he looks so frail, so weak, but i'm glad i actually went to go visit him with gwen.
i love my granddaddy ! (:

then we went to sheng siong to get some vitasoy for him, some biscuits, some orange peel to improve his appetite & some newspaper to keep him entertained.
then he ate & drank while me & gwen massaged his legs for him, more or less, then he looked very sleepy already.
so we left to go to orchard !(:
trained it to orchard, fully packed, then went to collect gwen's camera,
at sony's service thingy,
after that we walked around, then decided to go grab dinner to fill our tummyyyyyy.

saw this thing, ANGUS HOUSE.
decided to go there to check out the prices,
saw the menu " beef sirloin grilled steak..... $99 "
gwen was like " HOH SHIT !?! $99 fucking dollars !?! "
then we turned around & walked off,
went to coffee club after that, much cheaper.
both of us ordered ALFREDO, seriously yummy,
then a ice mocha & a muddy mudpie, i shall upload it later tonight.

walked around orchard road for a while then trained it back to pasir ris.
pretty awesome the streetlights.
came home & cooked mushroom soup ^^

thats all for this few days :)
happy belated birthday LIYANA !
& i cant wait for next year where i'll see the juniors !
haha, && thinking of that,
i haven finished my homework..
fuggggg !

slut

2007-12-18T18:43:00.000+08:00

great, now people calls me a slut.
what did i ever do,
well,
ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.
right, now i have a fucking bad reputation.
riggghhhtttttttttttttttttttttttt.
well i dont fucking care anymore.
i lead life the way i want it.
people doesn know whats happening here,
see whats on the stage & you critise me.
well, your rights, no can stop you.

what people see is the stage,
not behind scenes,
they can say what they like,
call me a slut, a bitch whatever,
i know i'm a bitch, but definitely not a slut.

"the pejorative words slut, harlot, whore describe a sexually promiscuous woman^{[citation needed]}. In great contrast to the glamour of rake for men, slut is unglamourous and also historically refers to an unhygienic woman who is personally dirty and unkempt."

well, you called me a sexually promiscuous girl, a slut, i understand i'm unglamourous,
but seriously, you dont know me, so shut up.
i dont deny, i am a very messy person, i dont keep things in place & my room's like a closet, but i'm so not a personally dirty & unkempt person, you so do not have rights to scold me that.

i'm sick of living like this where people critise me for everything i do, everything i do, people comment about it, like i've got absolutely no life, to do anything i want, no life to make my own decisions, it sucks big time.
i'm tired of people telling me everything i do is wrong, so tell me, what should i do & then people will be happy, kill myself & vanish from this world ?

melissa is lost, period, & i'm starting on homework already.

sunday

2007-12-17T20:24:00.000+08:00

sunday was pretty okay, i'm re-blogging about it.
went out to east coast with gwen & cass, rollerbladed.
there was this guy called Nathaniel, i so called went to ask for his number.
& got pretty nervous, & first thing he messaged me was, what's the other girls number ?
meaning gwen, because cass didn talk much.
i got so fecking pissed then i cried really hard, & i screamed like mad on the rocks -.-
then gwen hugged me, i felt a lil better though.
then we played sand near the shore,
gwen says sand exfoiliates the skin, but i was thinking, definitely NOT singaporean sand, because it's filled with oil -.-
yucks.
then we went to macscafe.
we were all eating then decided to ask this guy's number, but he's attached, so no number.
then there was this guy called Farhan, asked for his number.
then started messaging, he was funny.
then all of a sudden he messaged " she's not into me la, so no use "
then gwen took the number & messaged him, saying to me, we both can be his friends.
that instant, no messages received from him already, HOH.
nevermind3, night time was worse.
was talking to varian,
then batt was flat, so i told him to call cass if he wanted company.
cass's cousin, she slept over last night.
any pictures, go to www.omgwenzilla.blogspot.com

then varian kept on telling me, over & over,
" melissa you're 56198465168431654897841 times uglier than gwen "
i was like, " vae, i know, dont have to keep reminding me "
then i was telling him about the whole day events.
then he was like " hoh, no wonder they didn want your number, or even talk to you, because you aint wearing a bikni, & cannot wear one "
that statement, he repeated over 8945165487 times.
was quite sad about it, imagine your best friend saying that to you, i know he is very straight-forward, i shouldn take it to heart. jokes are jokes, but just dont carry them too far.
he did, & he made me cry.
then like, after that, carian talked to cass already, he didn want to talk to me.
AT ALL.
& he says i'm like sensitive or so because he was just joking.
seriously, i can take jokes but not until it hurts me.
now he doesn want to talk to me at all,
just because when i was crying myself to sleep, he called me & i told him i didn want to talk to him.

& i practically cried myself to sleep last night.
HOH, no one knows,
then2 today i didn knwo what was with me ,
i kept on thinking about my best friend.
varian.
dang.
kept talking about him too, i think cass was pretty pissed with me, because varian only wants to talk to her.

enough blogging before i start crying again.
& i think i should get used to being rejected & ignored, pathetic i know.
& i havent done ANY of my homework.
tell me to start, someone, PLEASEEEEEEEEE.

east coast

2007-12-16T20:50:00.000+08:00

fun yet sad.
rawr !

blogger & computer is screwed >.<

2007-12-15T18:31:00.000+08:00

i dont know what happened to my poor baby, its screwing up, badly, i cant even install MSN again. daddy washed the computer >; & now i have nothing left in the computer, zilch, nada, zero, nothing,all my 500+ songs, my games, my photos, all gone, grrrr, rawr! & because this pathetic blog is so called closed, i can complain for all i care, rawr. i need something to eat seyh, i'm hungry like wuttttttt !

today's day was pretty much boring, i couldn go out because of guitar lessons in the early afternoon & tuition in the evening, which i just came back from, gwen was at home but she's going out for dinner with her friends now, oh well. i need MSN ! & someone please just message me, i'm simply dying from boredom, anw.

last night conference with khairul & danny, haha, both of them simply make me laugh oh so much, then danny had to hang up & so left me & khairul talking luhh, so funny, we finally put down because i wanted to go sleep.

someone pleaseeee rawr, i miss maliah :(

2007-12-14T23:27:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY MARIAAAAAAAAAAAAA <333
HAPPY 13TH BIRTHDAY KHAIRUL ANWAR <333

a guy

2007-12-14T16:15:00.000+08:00

from the day i met you, i knew you, i knew i wouldn regret liking you.
i never regreted. i confessed to you, i know i'm a little on the rough side, but i'm like this, i'm straight forward, i guess thats the part that ruins my friendship with people, ruins relationships with people. i thought i had moved on without you, i thought me & you will just be friends, & we are, best friends, & i know it would stay this way, one way or another.
but the failed relationships that gone spoof after i thought i had been over you, made me even clearer in my thinking, i never got over you. i never once did, all these while, i lied to myself, thinking it would help in getting over you, but it didn, it never did.
i'm sorry to say, i have never gotten over you, its that thing that makes you, you, that attracts me to you.
i really dont want our friendship to be ruined just because of me, i'm sorry.

jealousy aint good.

2007-12-14T01:03:00.000+08:00

quote from friend's blog.
if i were to rate my life,
i'll rate it 2/10 for the 10 to be the best.
first thing, my life's pretty crappy & all, my homework aint done, i just broke up with my boyf who loves me so much, i just felt like being alone for this particular time, i dont know why, my best friends in malaysia, count on it, i think i'm rather much a pathetic loser, i dont have much friends, or maybe say very close friends my age, if so if i do, its guys, they cant stand girls nagging & whining day and night, i'm such a girl, i whine & i complain.
should have started on my homework since the end of november, but after looking at the papers that i'm given, i push it back, and now what, i have less than 2 weeks to complete alot of homework, i really must start on my homework now, if not i'll really be such a loser. the start of sec 2 will be in 2008, which gives me less than 2 weeks to jumpstart my studies, i want to study well, i want to get good grades & get into a good class in sec 3. but why aint i studying now ? i really have absolutely no clue.
considering cousin's in town for 2 weeks & she's staying over at my house most of the time, well, its pretty okay, i have like 184513518416512 things to be jealous about, i know i shouldn be, but i'm a girl, a girl in her pre-teen age, i get jealous like super much. first thing, the attention everyone showers on her, i know its because she lives elsewhere not in singapore, but see the difference, i get really sensitive about it,
1) my grandpa actually told her to be careful & go home early & even asked if she'd eaten, while i was just beside there, like talking as if, its only her there, & when i go to see him on my own, he only says this, " i want to sleep ", the difference in attention-showering is there.
2) my other cousin, 28 years old, asked my cousin to go out clubbing with her, & go to lesbian clubs / whatsoever, me & cousin's age is only 1 year difference, i dont see whats with the big age-gap, 28 year old cousin treats me as if i'm 8 compared with this big sister who looks like 17, i do agreee, standing beside my cousin, i look like some little kid, because she dresses much older than how she actually is, but then what, i'm also your cousin okay, treat me as if what, ast least just ask if i wanna go out with you, as least just ask, you dont have to be biased until like that just because she looks older & slangs.
3) you're born singaporean, changing your citizenship wont make you a citizen who grew up there, its the difference in nationality, but acting like one, wont make you one, it'll only make you a banana, a yellow-skinned white flesh, get what i mean ?

i know its bad to bitch about others, my life's just crap, i've got no one to share anything with, i'm bad at friendships, i ruin mine easily, i'm bad at relationships too, i cant help it, i'm just this way, my lifes rated at 2/10, which is a utter disaster, i wish someone could just slap me & tell me to wake up, i dont know what to do anymore, i cry everynight, reminscing over all the mistakes i did, like breaking up wit my boyf, why did i do that ? i really dont know, the need for dependance ? i think it is, i think i should stay single for the rest of my mind, i procrastinate too much, i suck at making decisions, i should start 2008 anew, like do everything right.
my heart breaks, i dont know what to do with my life anymore, its in a mess, i cant stop crying, tears just keep flowing down. i'm tired of everything, i'm tired of being me, i'm tired of being melissa, that bitch who bitch about others, i want to be someone else, someone better.
why isit always i'm the one being concerned about others, why cant someone care for me, & when someone does care for me, i dont appreciate it, god, tell me i'm a bitch. the only one conforting me now is Aman, thank you alot bestie. i think i would prefer the confort of my beds, where i can keep crying my hearts out, going back to emo-ing again, whats with me !?
i want my life to be like 5/10, my pathetic losery life is rated 2/10, almost on the verge of breaking off, can i just die ?

MCR

2007-12-12T15:28:00.000+08:00

MCR

woo !, came back from MCR like at 11 ?
went there at 5+ to meet patrick, got down the bus & like got nobody, i still thought we were very early.
then ate at BK before going to max pavillion there to queue up, turns out there was like super duper alot of people queuing up already, & i thought i was kiasu to go at 5 -.-"
then met patrick & he queued up with us, from 5.30 to 7.30 sit outside the max pavillion.
there were like $75, $85, $95 & the queue jumpers,
funny there were like 1984651684651 queue jumpers, some random guy said " whats the use of a queue jumper if there are lots of queue jumpers. "
i kinda agree, at 5.30 there was ALOT of queue jumpers already.
so like should be like, have a ticket to queue-jump the queue jumpers right ?
then went in and ran all the way to the front, was VERY squishy cos many people were pushing like shit.
skip the small details, some woman rubbed her boobs on my back, and some guy rubbed his chest on my back too, elbowed him in the stomach & then kicked him, HAHA.
then me & gwen got pushed to the front, was like in a very awkward position & there was condoms in the air ? like wtf.
then until 8.45 then the concert started off with Summer's Over, the opening band for MCR.
they were good, & then it got very very very packed with people.
push push push push to the front and i couldn breathe because i'm too short & i didn have much energy to push off people who pushed me.
gwen helped me quite alot because she got like 651894651651684516 times much strength than i did. so thanks gwen :)
then we got to the second front row in the middle, then this stupid fucking malay emo guy punched me in the boob, and i punched his chest really hard.
then he elbowed my face and stucked his face beside mine, usefulness of the head, whack people with it.
& so i did, bam, then he went missing until nearly the end of the concert, he touched my neck, & i thought it was gwen but it was him, gwen then put her arm around my neck & he actually pinched her.
fuck him la, knnccb, touched me and pinched gwen, fuck you.
then some other malay guy told him to get out because it was like molesting, then he was like " i drank "
fuck you, drink then fucking dont fuck your fucking way into the concert & fucking touch people you fuckingemofuckface.
& then there was this caucasian MCR hardcore fan, who tried to push her way in between me & this really tall caucasian guy.
i used the gate to push her way la, then she told me to fuck off & called me a bitch, HAHA, then i was like " KNN la !, fuck off man, go some fucking elsewhere ! "
then was was like " 1, 2, 3 push, i'll make a space for myself then !"
haha, i thought i couldn push her away but i did, so thank god!
& thanks to that caucasian tall tall guy who elbowed her in the chest :)
god i keep gushing about it !
it was pretty awesome & the music was great !
haha & until the end of the concert then i realised my jean's buckle came off & my jeans was about to drop already.
HAHA, but overall, MCR WAS AWESOME BEB !

& now to settle with the HAIKAL IMPOSTER.

hey idiot, when you tagged,
my haikal was out at clarke quee at the point you tagged.
there's no point in tagging using his name because what matters is i believe him.
& i know it aint him,
tagging using other's name is so cowardly.
you should get a life, & get some balls because you're such a balless asshole.
fuck off & please fucking state your name if you want to continue spamming or scolding me.
i'm fine with you scolding me bitch, i know i'm one.
but my friends love me still, so fuck off,
i dont know you & you have no fucking right to call me one.
it takes 1 bitch to call another a bitch.
so bitch, let me tell you something.
using his name to scold me, impostering him.
will lead you nowhere.
& 1 more thing.
impostering as haikal, & scolding me & saying you hate me,
wont ruin our relationship, thats for sure.
so you can forget about breaking me & haikal up.
because you'll fail terribly & miserably.
okays, clear ?
i really hope you'll read this & if you do, please tagg & say you read.
:)
if i know who you are, better fuck off from my life because you are so not welcome to be mine.
i love haikal & he loves me too.
so shut the fuck up & get your own life you faggot.

pictures from yesterday

2007-12-11T13:08:00.000+08:00

me & my darling Si Ling, that cute little baby.
i think i look funny in this picture, haha.
a girl can never have too many shoes, i want those some day ayee :)
me & gwen's yellow pumps,
i didn know when she took it -.-"
pretty gwen, love her to bits.
me and gwen in the toilets of white sands, (: (:

gwen and me, she's frigging much taller than me >.<

happy 3 week darling !

pictures ;

i'm bored, & yesterday me and gwen bought this ring, that we both wear one the same finger, same design, same size.
haha, & brenda's chalet was fun, kaee i'm being an old lady gushing about the same old story again & again.
cheers to the sistership (:
13 years going on 14 & staying strong.
known gwen since i was born, played with her since i was young,
even if she's at Australia, she's exactly like my sister, but i dont have one.
we go shopping together, watch movies together & do what sisters would do.
she's the best sister-cousin i ever have.
GWEN ILOVEYOU to bits <3333333333333333

updatee !

2007-12-11T00:31:00.000+08:00

SUNDAY

first thing i went to go fetch gwen at the airport at 8.
was like fugging excited so i got dressed at 6, which is freaking early.
then then left for the airport alone at 8, which i reached at 8.25
after that checked the arrival which said her flight was 9.30 instead.
so waited there until Jonathan & Johan came along.
then wait wait until Nicky, Kok Sin, & some other guy came along.
then saw gwen's aunty & uncle.
then after that gwen came out at 10.35 -.-"
a frigging dang long wait uh.
so then after that came home with gwen, god her accent so thick.
HAH, i mean it in a good way.
and then we came home & then walked to downtown east.
just me and gwen, alone, in the dark lanes -.-"
then after that, we walked home then we slept.
reached home about 12+ i think.
& boyf talked to gwen, ahah.

MONDAY

woke up at like 8 in the morning & went out at 9+,
went to white sands kopitiam to eat some egg & toast.
because gwen wanted singaporean style, so yeahs.
then after that we went to tampines mall to find a manicure & pedicure shop.
but none opens at 10+, if have need to have appoinment.
so finally found one at century square, 12 o'clock appt.
walked around & this thai guy whistled at gwen & she freaked out.
HAHAH, then came to this shop called " lovely land "
it sold elmos cookie monsters and bigbirds, ohmygod, so cute tau !
there were all 3 of them, like super squishy and rounded, sitting beside one another at the bottom of the display glass.
then after that met daddy mummy & brother.
ate at the soup restaurant with family ( inc. gwen )

then brother bought me and gwen slippers.
oh yeah & gwen's french manicure looks fake but its real, aha.
& then she bought alot of stuff.
after that took a taxi back with brother & then headed for tanah merah with gwen.
& then waited for uncle wilfred to pick us up then went into the chalet.
god it was frigging far in, & i didn bring swimming stuff so yeah, :(
sneaked into the jacuzzi though, only the legs if not i would get wet,
& then went bowling, pool-ing & arcad-ing.
saw a couple of guys which were quite good at pool and bowling, but funny, no girls.
then slacked around & skooter-ed the place with gwen.
made a new friend called Farhan,counter staff for the entertainment centre.
17 & just came from Bedok View Sec.
he had this really nice lip piercing, god i want one, but mom doesn allow.
& boyf doesn want me to, so yeahs.
i shall be a good girl & not pierce for now,
tomorrow's me and boyf's 3 weeks :)

just in case i cant blog tomorrow, because its finally MCR,
i might say this first,
happy 3 weeks anniversary kesayangan !
tmr meeting daddy & patrick at 2 at white sands to have lunch,
god i need to get some sleep now, i'm frigging tired.
i miss you syg, alot.

MCR YO !
hope can get alot of pictures yeahs.
AND i'm watching 881 now, at like 1.42 in the morning.
god, i wanna sleep.
& gwen's sleeping like a log now.
i should join her sometime soon.

first time in ages my phone was FULLY FLAT.
frigging ass laa !

love you guys all :)
881 is cool :D:D

post ?

2007-12-09T16:48:00.000+08:00

boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.
boredddddddddddd la.

nothing much

2007-12-08T19:34:00.000+08:00

about to blog, i like this sweet. " werther's original "
been on it since yesterday.
eyhh ! ability to blog is gone.
nothing interesting happends.
nothing stupid makes me laugh like shit.

today guitar class was a utter bore, i forgot everything in the past 5 months :x
doing FNB homework now.
& tuition was super boring as usual.
considering that, xavier was so super quiet.
rawrala.

then i started singing she bangs.
;xxxx.
i didn know i was singing loudly cos like everyone was quiet & all.
then suddenyl xavier whacked me -.-"
asking me to shut up cos i sing too loud.
haha.
then i'm WILMA.
and xavier is WILLY.
haha.

some people would know whats a willy.
go check.
haha.
and xavier's name.
WILLY
so you know willy hunged ?
haha, god i'm mean, making fun of someone's surname.
sorry people.

&& after that, i did my homework super fast !
& i slacked after that.
then then then.
walked home with boyf finally messaging me.
ugh i'm bored shitless.

i can do something :)

Maliah : My best friend, sweet adorable nice pretty little lady with a fluent taste of english.
Syafiqah : My good friend, pretty lady who is able to scold very well.
Nadia : My good friend, pretty babe whose a good bilingualist.
Nisaa : My classmate, very friendly and lovable english speaking girl.
1/7 classmates : horny, friendly, loud and laughable.
Shirley : My god-sister, cute and adorable tall darling.
1/6 people : nice, funny and very loud.
Nadia 1.1 : pretty pretty gorgeous girl.
Secondary 1s 2007, : great people to be with :) esp, those nice girls & guys i'm friends with, too much to list.
Benedict : My god-son, helpful little big boy.
1/8 people : all very nice & friendly.
Vanessa : My Twinnie , pretty babe.
Michael : My god-brother, handsome eurasian with good drumming skills.
He Han : My god-son, funny & horny guy with a little accent.
Darryl Lim : My god-brother, funny & obsessed with FOB.
1/9 people : great kind people :)
Boyf : my handsome, hott, cute little baby.

eeyeeer, too many people to list & say about them, shall continue day by day.
shall talk about my gans then (:

Yen Soon : god daddy
Kim Siew : god mummy

god brothers
jun an
han bin
chi sheng
jonathan
mervyn
gang jie
yan xiang
kar kheng
husni
aloysius
mustaqim
bernard
izzat
theophilus

god sisters
constance
felicia tin
felicia yam
wei min
denise
raudiah
sherry tang
cherilyn
amanda
susan
kiko
aisyah
latifah

godd, i've got nothing nothing to do.
sorry if it makes people angry,
i'm too bored.
RAWRALA

boringg tauu

2007-12-07T17:34:00.000+08:00

boring, nothing to blog about,
stupid weather.
sickening laaa.

061207 :)

2007-12-06T21:11:00.001+08:00

introducing, kate leong & nur hidayah, my 2 besties since p2.
~~PHOTO~~ DELETED
me and pretty hidayah, i love her loads :)
the 3 besties, 061207 :))
PHOTO DELETED
me & pretty hidayah again, i look so funny !
that big spiderman in cineleisure mall.
THE AFTERMATH of messing food up :) we're monsters we know :]
our lunch, clockwise, hid's, kate's & lastly, mine. (BEFORE)
my muddy mudpie/ also my lunch :]

061207, god it was so fun out with my two besties.
last saw either of them in p4, which is 3 years ago, & now we finally met up, god it felt so good :)
took the train to orchard, met kate & hugged her. aha,
then waited for hidd & went to coffee club to eat lunch.
god, so expensivee laa. but we had fun,
pictures above are when we went to coffee club to eat lunch.
haha. & then we headed to watch a movie at cathay cineleisure.
watched ENCHANTED
gosh, it was hell funny.

talked about some cinderella called Chisele.
then she always sang something " i've been dreaming of a true love's kiss " or something like that.
it was hell funny, laughed so hard.
then she went into reality where she learnt what was true love,
instead of the fairytale love stories.
it was quite helpful too i guess.
& she made her own clothes using the curtains, i wanna learn too !

then after that we went to walk around the shops.
god, they sell the guy's boxer, spongebob one.
so cute tauu ! then saw the bikinis, gosh, so nice designs !
then after that went to starbucks at wisma atria.
then boyf called me, asking me about darryl.
god, speaking of darryl will make my blood boil.

speaking of darryl.
let me tell you the whole story.
darryl chia, is the one who i've been blogging about the past 3 posts.

you see, the relationship with darryl lasted only 4 days.
& after that, we didn talk, & all of a sudden.
he started messaging me.
telling me how incompatible we are.
telling me as though i want him back.
i have my boyf now, & i love him with all my heart, why in the world would i want him back!?
and anyways, he started calling me a bitch & a whore.
then he came to this very blog, to scold me & boyf.
i'm pretty much pissed la.
then this darryl chia, says want to fight.
who do you think you are darryl ?
you think i'm going to take your words seriously ?
you say you're in a gang, & say what, secret gang.
FYI, if the gang aint known by anyone, its not called a gang anymore.
you stupid or what ?
pleasee laa, use your brain can ?
you may be smart, studying at some good school.
but if you suck in personal matters.
i dont think you'll even make friends laa.
KB laa, dont act big fuck please.
no gang just say so, saying you're in one, or are one, doesn make you intimidating okays.
dont come butting into my life, when you're already out of it like
157819462626 years ago, you absolutely have no right to,
nevertheless even can butt into my life.
you're trying to ruin mine, ruin my relationship now.
well, i'm happy to tell you, i treat you like an ass, a brainless one.
& i'm very happy to tell you that, i will not,
WILL NOT allow you to ruin my life, or even come into & mess it all up.
never. so just fuck off from my life & disappear for good, i'll really thank you then.

god, i hope i wont have to blog about him anymore.
makes me feel like blasting his head off.

gaahh, period crams are horrible.
stupid girl thing laa.

some mushy stuff, haha read or not, you choose.
not for the weak-hearted oke :)

baby, how come i feel we're drifting apart ?
i dont want us to drift apart.
& thank you for giving in to me all the time.
i love you :)

late update

2007-12-05T21:12:00.000+08:00

gosh.
kay i lost my ability to blog.
dang,
and tmr is day out with kate & hid darling :)
kay, i'm bored.
happy 1 month to nadia & qayyum :)

2007-12-04T21:47:00.000+08:00

JERK tuition says:
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JERK tuition says:
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MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
ha whose humji.
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u 2
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MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
hiding behind a com screen calling me a bitch and blocking me
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friday
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see u face to face
JERK tuition. says:
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MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
haha, retard siole.
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
i go for tuition not to see such fuckers like you.
JERK tuition. says:
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JERK tuition. says:
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MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
and no need to say, even wasting my breath on you.
JERK tuition. says:
find cousin
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tok to mi
JERK tuition. says:
ownself no mouth?
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
hey, who started blocking huh ?
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
ha, contradicting yourself nia.
JERK tuition. says:
anything
JERK tuition. says:
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JERK tuition. says:
zzz
JERK tuition. says:
byebye
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
haha humji.
JERK tuition. says:
yar
JERK tuition. says:
i hum ji
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
dont act big fuck please.
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
JERK tuition. says:
i wan
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
its horribly disgurting.
JERK tuition. says:
haha.
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
* disgusting
JERK tuition. says:
i dun care out u
JERK tuition. says:
*bout
JERK tuition. says:
lol
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
erm, do i look like i want care ?
JERK tuition. says:
den diam lah
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
ha you think what, everybody is a ass like you ?
JERK tuition. says:
still tok so much
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
for god's sake
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
son of a bitch.
JERK tuition. says:
maybe onli u?
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
fuckface siole.
JERK tuition. says:
BITCH
JERK tuition. says:
lol
JERK tuition. says:
dun lyk that
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
thank you for that
JERK tuition. says:
prostitiute
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
son of a bitch.
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
pathetic siole.
JERK tuition. says:
go geylang
JERKtuition. says:
byebye
JERK tuition. says:
gogogo
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
you cn go to desker road.
JERK tuition. says:
quick
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
cb
JERK tuition. says:
zzz
JERK tuition. says:
gg
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
cn go for all i care.
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
no need act polite.
MELISSA ! I LIKE, I LOVE ! says:
cb.
JERK tuition. says:
i gtg
JERK tuition. says:
gg

funny you are such a loser. LOSERR.

haha some ass.

2007-12-04T20:18:00.000+08:00

"maybe its time i told you the truth and not to keep it from you anymore ,
look at me, who am i , and look at you ?
did it ever cross your mind that we were never compatible?
if no, then i'm telling you now, we weren made for each other at first ,
how could we even stead when i just knew you for 1 day?
its near to impossible , you should have known that,
& i was never close to you even during
the four days we were together,
i'm telling you now, i'm a gangster yes,
and you are the good girl type,
we could never have been together,
just ask yourself that, and i only steaded with you
for one reason, find that out by yourself,
call me a bastard, a fucker or whatever,
i dont care. i can only say one thing,
i'm sorry that i lied to you and treated you like a toy."

boy uh boy,
please laa, who begged me not to leave you huh ?
please laa, dont think the world's just you & yourself.
okays, i do admit, i once thought of the world as you.
i once thought i liked you so much.
and reason why i accepted your stead ?
the need for dependance.
call me desperate, whatever.
how could you call yourself a gangster mans.
come on, you dont hear on the streets,
" i'm a gangster "
do you ?
i have nothing towards gangsters.
dont call yourself one if you are.
i highly doubt you are one.
because you dont act like one, & you definitely are not fit to be one.
i shan't waste my time on you.
one word for you.
PATHETIC LOSER.
you act as if i want you back badly mans.
please.
be a guy & act like one.
call me a bitch & then block me.
ha, pathetic & balless.

really hope you would read this boy,
because you are sucha pathetic loser.

anw, yesterday was sucha blast, went out with maria, stephanie & terese.
and we ice-skated, quite a long while.
had our equal share of laughter & falls.
then saw this girl whose nipples could be seen.
so visibly, i saw it on accident, wasn on purpose.
then saw this other girl's pad.
because she wore white pants which got wet after some falls.
pictures mostly at maria's blog, because her mom took photos.
yeahs.

then slept once i came home,
boyf called 16 times and i had 5 smses.
mwaha, sorry peeps, i was sleeping.
then boyf called me at 11.45, which i woke up after sleeping at 7.
ahah, then slept at 2 again.
ate brother's famous amos cookies.
& brother's name is Amos, ahah.

kay enough blogging, i'm bored.
& i'm making sentences with michael using song titles.
FUN TAUU !
<3
mich just came back from NZ & AUZ.
dang, rich kid.
ahah.
WELCOME BACK NADIA :)

ice-skating + some news

2007-12-04T16:12:00.000+08:00

god, why i look so white !? & thats maria with her uber white teeth.

god, my bones are like being crushed everytime i stand up,
my knees have bruises, my arms are swollen.
and i feel like some dying person.
someone kill me please.
and i just did my english compo :)
cheers.
i'm too lazy to update for once.
please visit.
www.metallicobber.blogspot.com
for more info about ice-skating.
and please do not refrain from laughing at the pictures.
ahaha.
btw
happy 2 weeks baby ! <3

ice-skating

2007-12-04T15:15:00.000+08:00

will update further, my bones are breaking.

SUNDAYYY

2007-12-02T17:56:00.000+08:00

today is absolutely great :)
went out with boyf to Peninsulaaa to get my jeans & MCR shirt :]
then there was a guy following us, HAH, & i thought he was stalking us :x
but he's boyf's sister's friend. aha, then tried XS size in the shops but i couldn fit :xx
S was just right, but not many shop carried that size, so quite depressed kan.
then bought a MCR t-shirt, god, i love it so much :)

there, my new t-shirt :)
and then and then, i finally FINALLY bought my red skinnies & white skinnies.
so i can strike them off my list now :)
then boyf, friend & i walked around,
made him go to fort canning park with me :xx
sorryy !
and and and then, we walked alot, then decided to take the train back.
B taught me some malay, which i found quite funny.
laughed so hard that i couldn say " press the bell "
so in the end i say " prek prek prek the ball "
-.-"
i know its like whatthementos laaa.
then he teach me say.
toilet bowl in the toilet. , " jamban dalam tandas "
i think, aha, sorry teacher.
then its like, " gigi " is teeth.
"kuku" means nails.
then the convo went like this.

Me : B, what is ear ?
Him : telinga or sth like that.
Me : then why is "with" said as deng-an instead of den -gan ?
Him : i dont know, but its deng-an, not den-gan oke ?
Me : then why we say " kawan aku "and not " aku kawan "
Him : because malay language is opposite of what we say in english.
Me : okays, what is mouth then ?
Him : i dont know.
Me : what is lips then ?
Him : i dont know laa, exams also dont ask this type of questions one.
Me : they should set a exam on basic stuff, then you all can tell me what is facial stuff & all.
Him : i will fail it.
Me : now you already fail your exams kan ? if not why ask you then you dont know.
Him : uh i got A2 for malay oke.
Me : * shuts up *

then we started talking about the malay language.
haha, then he took a lift up with me to send me home :)
thank you :]
and, start my countdown,

1 day to ice-skating with maria :)
2 days to 2 week anniversary :))
3 days to english tuition :(
4 days to meeting HIDAYAH & KATE :))
5 days to maths tuition :(
6 days to guitar & science tuition :)
7 days to gwen's arrival :))
8 days to brenda's chalet :)
9 days to MCR concert :))

and and yesterday was so dangg-ed tiring,
at the yio chu kang center,
take care of little kids, scream at them, had fun with Kristal.
Kristal's my new friend.
mom's collegue, Kimberly's younger sister.
same age as me, 13, but study in SACS.
she's cool :)

her picture will upload tmr or something, becausee blogger is lagging.
-.-"
i miss maliah loads.
i miss nadia loads too.
i miss syafiqahh too.

as promised.

2007-11-30T22:52:00.000+08:00

random pictures taken at random times,
dont mind me ayee.

khairul gone to sleep, no one to talk to.
hadi is ignoring me, not talking to me.
boyf is talking to me on the phone (: i love you baby.
maliah is sleeping.
syafiqah i think talking to boyf.
nadia is way at L.A
maria is sleeping.
aman is at DUBAI.
gwen is at AUS.
yen soon daddy is sleeping.

dangg, i'm bored
what to do.
today was tuition and more studying.
maths is getting harder and harder with the stupid algebra which i just cannot
get into my head.
dang, stupid stupid.
this monday going ice-skating with maria & her friends.
and tmr is going to help out with mommy's kids,
mom's a teacher, so have grad ceremony for the kids.
and this sunday going out with B to peninsula to go buy
red skinnies/white skinnies.
and maybe some t-shirts,
depending on how much i actually remember to bring along.
ahah.
201107<3

i'm talking to baby on the phonee.
i miss you baby.
loads.
tag oke B :)

celeste & afiqah behind me :]

me & maliahh.

maliah & mee , (:

azlin & me in ncc uniform.

me and nad, i love NADIAA <33

maliah&nadia&me (: love them both.

me & maliah darling, love MALIAHH <33

i wanna eat that baby !

on the phone with ms sheliaaa (:

we are in that cornerr.

can seee my & maria's reflection.

maria looks abit pregnant, HA,

i know we look cool, aha, perasaaan jerr.

it says FCUK you.

i simply love her to bits, my VANESSA CHUA.

it says VANESSA AND MEL <3

blog later.

2007-11-30T15:42:00.000+08:00

shall blog later, after tuition.

bored

2007-11-29T23:02:00.000+08:00

bored,
one word.
bored.
ugh, sickening.

i want to get my red skinnies.
i want my band t-shirt.
i want this.
i want that.
god.
i need a job.
i want a job.
i want a job that pays & i cn have fun.

stupid.
i wish i was 1 year older.
then cn have job.
dangg, i sound despo for job.
kae i am.
but without a job,
i can live.

danng.
bfie called me talked only 15 mins :(
haish.
so boring tau.
talking to khairul on msn.
dang, i'm bored shit.

hadi,
cheer up mans.
dont get emotional every other day.
life is much more meaningful if you lead it cheerfully.
like you did in the past.
whatever happened to happy hadi ?
dangg.
i think its your job.
it changed you.
you didn even want to talk to me.
ugh.

terminal 3

2007-11-29T20:18:00.000+08:00

went to terminal 3, it rocks big time.
met vanessa at 11.15 + at white sands, then saw bernard kor kor.
then took 53 to terminal 3, then went to macs to eat lunch with vanessa, twinnie.
then sat next to some guys, one of them is darren, my kindergarden teacher's son.
ahaha, then said hi, and we crapped alot,
walked to terminal 3 then 2 then 1 then took the train back to 3.
the walk was kinda freaky because the corridors nobody&then quite quiet.
total it took 45 mins, and then went back to macs, to do some homework.
didn bother doing because we both couldn concentrate.
haha. and then we went up to the terminal 3's treetop walk.
no tree-top lah seyh.
dont know why there was such a name.
and then there i made 2 new friends.
Khairul and Daniel.
both 16,
from bartley sec and bedok north.
ahah.

then vanessa and i like giler alr,
played with the lift, and then walked here and there.
khai and daniel took the bus 24
and i took 53,
then thats all.

had a fun day with vanessa twinnie <3

quite happy tau,
then talked to maliah on the phonee.
i miss you maliahh.

funny how come you so nice to her,
but yet treat me like what like that.
seriously,
i still want you as a friend.
but i dont think you want me as one.
you should know,
how racist you cn be.
you dont like me because of what ?
i dont know.
maybe because of things i do.
someone told me to calm down.
i did, i did try.
i try so hard to be one of your friend.
i really tried.
why wont you just give me a fucking chance to be your friend.
when i asked about your life,
trying to sound as concerned as possible.
you treat me like crap.
i trusted you.
you said sorry to her, about how you treated her.
then me ?
am i not a human too ?
am i not a classmate of yours ?
right, reason being, she's malay, learns malay.
your type of people.
i'm not, because i try learning malay,and i'm chinese.
you group people too much girl.
seriously,
i dont care anymore.
if you get your friends to come maki me,
or get everyone from not friending me.
girl, i want you to know,
that friend dont friend thing,
is a thing of the past, and its a childish behavior.
girl, even without you,
i have friends who love me for who i am.
dont say i'm being despo for friends.
i have friends, i just want to try making friends with you.
get that fact straight and clear.
stop being biased and prejudiced.
i miss my old you, where is the old you ?
dangg, i feel better.

28 11 07

2007-11-28T16:03:00.000+08:00

today is a cold and freaking bad day.
first thing woke up at 10,
and then chatted with boyf until he had to go offline.
and then went for tuition.
boyf said he would pick me up,
oh well, he ate late, and i left already,
so i dont blame him.
:)
tuition was uber boring, no one to look at, in the end look at this girl.
god please dont say i'm lesbo.
she's really pretty,
name's Eve.
and then she's sec 2 next year.

god, then i fell down, and caught a cold,
and boyf is out with his friends.
and he didn sms me back.
oh well.
he just smsed me back.

i'm bored.
i cant wait for gwen to come back.
so much stuff to do.
tmr is terminal studying with vanessa <33
and friday is escape theme park + tuition.
then sat is helping mum out at dont know where.
get to skip tuition & guitar lesson.

<3
i love you syg.

second post again.

2007-11-27T22:30:00.000+08:00

this bag is officially so cute ! i wonder if they sell it in singapore, i would buy it :)

domokon or whatever his name is, is cute !

dirty dancing, looks cool tauu (:

i find this rather funny, the chickens are dancing ?

i should read this.

as i'm thinking about candy.
i'm thinking, would there be a doll.
which can be eaten ?
like her hair is those spagetti strips of candy.
and her eyeballs are sweet candyballs.
and her head is chocolate coating of strawberry lollipop.
her arms are detachable and are soft gummy.
and so is her body and legs.
practically,
like you buy a candy doll.
which you actually eat when you're hungry.
and you can buy more just in case if you're hungry.

melissa stop thinking about food !

funny whats with my stomach nowadays.
i eat so little because seeing food makes me sick.
but i'm hungry.
and then,
i saw agnes today !
my primary 1 school mate.
she's so tall now.
and like really pretty.
in tampines secondary.
agnes ng, gosh, i remember her with her 2 pony tails at the side of her head.
and she always got bullied because she was too nice and soft-hearted.
once she got into a fight, because this girl didn like her,
and she kept on crying and didn want to go to school.
but she seems so tough now !
i just remembered, how long i didn touch my battle-on-ing.
ahaa, what a word, i'm talking to myself on my blog again.
tmr i have tuition at simei, kent-ridge.

have to reach there by 11+ because it starts at 12.
i'm finding people to go peninsula with me because i need my red skinnies quick.
thursday is study with VANESSA, twinnie.
at terminal 3, 2 or 1
depending on where's available.
then friday got tuition again,
but going to escape with benedict&mun mun they all,
practically the 1/8 people.
because my class people dont seem too enthu, the chinese i meant,

1/7 is mostly malays so yeahs.
they cn be bit racist at times,
but who cares.
i love them still, even if they dont like me.
i consider them good friends but its not vice-versa.. haha, what a big joke.
i love maliah, azlin, syah, adli, aizat, nabil & lots more.
funny i just dont get along with the chinese of my class.
i rarely talk to them.
most is with the malays,
if not bin xiang, bryan and zhan rong.
the rest of my good friends,
in 1/8, 1/9, 1/6, 1/3, 1/4, and 1/1.
then the others is upper sec.
and other schools.

a very very big congratuation to.
xavier lum ( my di di ) , adk angkat .
for getting.
top 10% SG edusave scholarship!

you did well little boy!
okays, i'm being mean.
ahah.
xavier congrats !!
you smart kiddo.

HAPPY 1 WEEK SYG !

2007-11-27T21:51:00.000+08:00

a happy 1 week anniversary sayang (:

today was super uber boring.
from now on i shall blog not paragraph-like, hard even for me to read.
woke up at 2, ahah, i know its late.
talking to myself at my own blog, funny bodoh.
and then good-girly, did my science worksheet.
so i can proudly stroke off,science worksheet ~~not done~~ DONE !
and then talked on msn with AMANDA darhling.
gosh, she's so sweet (:
anyway, we both were like finding jobs.
then found 4 and applied for them.
but till now since 2+, i haven received any reply.
sad, and boyf has been out the whole day at theme park.
:( i miss him.
and the whole day have been doing homework.
how good girl, HA, i'm bored to death.
the moment mommy came back, i started chattering to her until she got a headache.
sorry mommy.
then brother & daddy came home, started my chattering again,
daddy fell asleep while i was talking.
ahah.
then i saw my tickets (:
yeahs babe.
i'm going for mcr concert on 11 dec with gwen :)
got the moshing pit place.
ayee :]

finally boyf is online (:
missed him so badly.
talking to him on msn :DD

happy 1 week anni again b (:

10 dec is mom's bdae.
9 dec is gwen's arrival in singapore.
10 dec is brenda's chalet.
11 dec mcr concert !
11 dec go queue up early because the seats are first come first serve.

11 december, mcr concert <3

taggers

2007-11-26T20:55:00.000+08:00

hey MELISSA IMPOSTER

right, you say i have no balls.
you quote that.
tell me why then.
what in the world did i do ?
break up with your friend irfan and i get hated by alot of people ?
right.
i dont mean to be rude or whatsoever,
at least,
if i do go warn people/give people advices ( like yours )
i would just state my name.
seriously,
it takes 1 ball-ess person to call another one.
you say you have balls,
but yet you dont dare state your name.
you're right,
i'm using this against you.
i dont see whats wrong in using it,
when you yourself is contradicting your statement.

i did break up with irfan,
no doubt aye.
i never once said, he broke up with me oke.
i dont blame him if he hates me,
nor would i hate other people if they hate me for breaking up with him.
maybe they hate me for bitching about others.
right, i dont care a whoop alright.
i bitch about others, as i used, BITCH, so i can say it in my blog.
they can find out for all i care,
and bitch about me too.
i dont initiate arguements.
come on.
i stayed out of his way,
i didn bitch about him FIRST.
he did FIRST.

everything is my fault aye.
i'm fine with it.
everything is my fault.
right on.
everybody says that.
i know that,
but funny, i dont seem to take it in.
call me a bitch, a slut, whatsoever.
i dont give a whoop.
seriously.
you can tell others,
what i blogged about you.
i dont care.
get irfan to come scold me,
i dont care.

i mean it.
tell others to come to my blog to spam me or talk to me.
fine with me.
leave your name if you even come here to scold me / give me advice.
that way, you wouldn be labelled by me as balless.
as you said.
you had balls and i dont.
right on.
have balls.
dont be known as nameless or anonymous.

thank you.
i tried being nice oke.
dont say i didn try.

start of homework

2007-11-26T19:01:00.000+08:00

i'm going to start doing my homework.

1) geography ( done, but haven printed 9 pages )
2) english worksheet& compo ( not done )
3) literature worksheet (not done)
4) chinese worksheet & read a chinese book ( not done )
5) home economics worksheet ( not done, need textbook )
6) science worksheet on particulate model of matter ( not done )
7) maths thick thick worksheet ( not done )
8) maths worksheet 15.4 volumes&surface area of solids ( not done )
9) DNT holiday assignment ( not done )

okee, i know i'm a naughty girl who hasn even pretty much done her homework, but i swear, i'm starting tomorrow, 271107 (: hey, its our 1 week anniversary (:

happy 1 week baby !
thanks for understanding me
thanks for being there for me
thanks for taking my complaints
& lastly,
thanks for the memories we had together :]
i love you (:

short post once again, because i shall start on my homework soon.
people tag okee ?
:)

pool

2007-11-25T19:57:00.000+08:00

met maria at 1, dickson drove me there again because brother was vye-passing there too. so dropped me at maria's main gate. and then went to tampines safra to play pool. quite crowded but luckily got pool table available. and then, we played 1 game then had some lunch - chips and lollies. ahah, a new stereotype of lunch, perfect. and then the guy at the counter, he looks thai and speaks like thai, god its so yucky.
i have nothing towards thai people, or people who look thai, but sheesh, he is ultra disgusting, and he kept looking at me, tried like, what, going near me and maria ? whatthementos lah. then i scolded him, and pointed the middle finger to him, maria agree ? he's awful. then after that we went to Tampines Mall to get **'s birthday present, he bought him a Billabong wallet, so expensive seyh. then went to terminal 3 with daddy and mommy, had fun taking pictures.

terminal 3 is cool, pretty cold, ahaha, why am i typing the same blogpost again, ahha, now is 10.43am and i'm meeting boyf at 12.30, yay (: and ohmygod, whatthementos ! i'm bored stiff !
and and and yesteday's pool was awesomee, maria we should go out more, next time to penin alright ? rawr. i neeed more skinnies, i should live next to penin, everyday go there buy huh. ahaha. i love syg <3

deleted posts.

2007-11-24T00:41:00.000+08:00

gah, deleted a whole blog post, gahh. anyways, slept at 2.30 after talking to boyf && aisyah kak && ohmygod, you wont believe, afiq senior ! you know afiq senior ! ouhk, that reaction's kinda over-reacted. anyways, chatted with the 3 of them for quite a while and afiq added me. whee. okays, i'm being random again, but thats just me. and then woke up at 10 today, freaking early lah, mommy allowed me to skip guitar lesson today :) yay ! thanks mommy. and then we went to takashimaya to go shopping (: went to wisma atria and got a blue top, god, i love it. and then shopped around, had chit-chats with daddy and mommy, sort of a bonding time :D

and then i told mommy, i'm going to get red skinnies, she was like, what red ? then i showed her, god, she actually said okay ! (: yay ! i'm going to get mine soon :D maybe can ask maria or mardiana or gwen out to buy peninsula together :} and then can go out shopping for clothes and stuff. oh yeah, karkheng intro-ed me to a website, kinda cool i guess, might consider buying a cardigan there. website is, this website is so cool > candylicious ^^

down there got different types of apparel and stuff. its a online order-buy thing, please do go see it, who knows, you might want to get something from there ^^ anyways, trust is most impt tau. okay, i'm like some thingy. aha.

red red red, and then after eating lunch, went to sony ^^ and i finally got daddy to buy me a walkman thingy, 2GB, finally after i gave my ipod away. mwahaha. thanks daddy :) and and and, then we shopped more, wanted to get clothes but they didn have my size, saw this awesome tube dress, i could fit it but but but, bad news is, it was too extremly 15479483232 duper long, reached nearly my ankle -.-" isit me being short or the dress being too long ? i think its me, mwahha.
and then the dress was like, green, the tube was tight, very tight, the smallest size, but stupid lah, i wanted it so badly.. but yet its too long, ugh. stupid !, now have to find a new one again. ugh, stupid takes so much time.

boyf aint online :( i miss him seyh. now charging the walkman (: god, 8 hours before i cn use it. hurhurrgh. and tummy's growling again, why uh ? -.-" i want food lah okee. mom's buying back for me ^^ yay. and then after all that, came back home to change shoes then headed for tuition. here comes the most exciting part, okee, so called exciting.

this guy called weiyang ( names changed )

tried take advantage of my sis while she was drunk, ( no names ) and then he stalked her home, that damned mother-fucking pervert. he is 24 i think, short as me, 150+ i think, and then he is uber duper weird. he doesn hang around with people his own age, he hangs around with people my age, 13/14/15&16, tell me he is weird. the last time i saw him 1 year ago. when he came uninvitedly to my chalet -.-" i dont even know him, cousin did, but she only asked her FRIENDS to come, he so called say my cousin asked him to come, but she didn even know him at that point of time. she didn ask him to come either. thick skin lah seyh.
and and and, he so fucking yucky *shudders* yuck yuck yucky. and then after that i didn see him already, then this year i saw him again, at loyang point, following my sister around. i asked her, she know him ? she say just met only, and he kept following her around, fuck lah, you think what seyh, privacy man.
so i told him * sorta warned him not to touch my sister if not he'll get it. and then in a huff, i walked away, after that he tried looking for me, but i already went for tuition. so too bad, then after tuition, mommy came to pick me up. then just now, on my way to tuition, on the bus 358, i saw him boarding the bus, next stopp my stop already, then like i panicked and all, so i quickly alighted. god, i was so scared, about to like scream already lah, then alighted already, heard people calling my name.
fuck then i walked faster, so scared he saw me and followed me, because i was alone and he was with like 6 other guy friends, so yeahs.
i know its cowardly of me to hide from him when i see him, but sheesh, i'm being cautious for my own safety, considering he tried taking advantage of my sister, what would he do to me ? slap me ? hunt me down ? i know its a cowardly act to do, but what to do ? i'm a girl, he's a what, 24 year old guy, i'm only 13. who knows what he can do.
ugh, melissa, be brave, he cant do much to you.. i think. melissa melissa, why were you so rash to sya that to him at that time, i know he wont forget it one, imagine a 13 year old coming up to you, pointing her index finger at you and saying " dont you dare touch my sister, if not you watch out ." imagine a 13 year old doing that to a 24 year old, kinda ehm you'll be very very angry and will want to get her back dont you ?

but god, uhm. anyways, syg is online now (: yay ! then now talking to boyf (:
i love you <3

bored.

2007-11-23T12:37:00.000+08:00

panic! at the disco, jon walker is hott (:

i want those striped pink-black stockies

hide away and run

pretty much artistic

cupcakes full of sweets

lollypop, this pic cute eyh.

a tragedy i know, sad tau.

this so speaks a thousand words

this is nicee, cool bread & egg.

new food i think, looks delicious (:

my darling kimchi because its so tasty !

donuts again, god, i want some !

donut ohmygod, so yummy-looking (:

paula deanda is super hot babe.

some days that i'm random, this happens && i haven started blogging, just came back from jogging with maliah, met her at 7 and " jogged " to the beach, with her sister, and then crapped alot on the way, dont you agree maliah ? aha, and then we became quite hyped up, and maliah walked in mud, mwahah, her shoes got wet, and everything was so funny, and then after that, me and malliah walked to loyang point to have our breakfast, yummy (: our goreri outing is awesome ! and i realised maliah is much taller than me AGAIN, and and and ,
we saw a squirrel !! it was so cutee !! and then after breakfast, maliah walked me home, half way & then she went home, after collecting her madrasah report book, its cool tau, religious class also got report book, and maliah got into a quite good class ^_^
congrats maliahh (:

rawr, i haven talked to boyf for 1 day already, starting to miss him :( anyways,
melissa, cheer up, look on the bright side, you can concentrate on blogging when boyf is offline :]
melissa is officially bored&random.

1st date with bfie.

2007-11-22T19:21:00.000+08:00

met him downstairs at 1, but then he was late, so i waited for 15 mins, and finally he came, in a white skinny jeans and a silverstein black shirt, god, he looked so hot, syg, you hottie ! and then we headed for the beach, he held my hand, and we walked to the beach, freaking hot, was quite awkward because there was no topic to talk about. but then he opened up & so did i ^______^
he so freaking tall 1.7m i think, god, i'm only 1.5m lahh, then when i look at him, have to look upwards, and then yeahs, funny tau, we had lots of fun, laughing and all. then he bought drinks and i shared with him, and then i bought drinks and all, hahas, in the end, we walked to white sands and then we kept laughing, i dont know why, whenever i look at him, he'll say " yes ? " hahas, and i'll start laughing again. whatthementos !
and i asked him if he thinks i'm short, he says quite short for a girl my age. aper jerr ? then he blanjahh-ed me drinks from macs, thanks dear ! and then we sat at the bus interchange before i took 359 home, he kissed me goodbye first ^__^
mwahaha.
i love my syg <3

no nyaa ?

2007-11-22T07:30:00.000+08:00

decided not to go for nyaa make up lessons because t-shirt aint dry, p.e shorts cant be found, i bet the teachers wont believe me, but thats that. funny why people read my blog yet dont tag huh ?
please tag after reading can :) i'm bored, currently typing this blog post at 7.33 am in the morning, meeting boyfie at 12 i think, we're going to the beach :] and then he's accompanying me to white sands to get some stuff, i need get some school stuff from popular, haha, my facebook babies look strong, so penat, later still got to go withdraw money first, and i have to wait until brother comes home, and then get my money from him, and then head to school bookshop to get my school stuff, before starting on my holiday homework, thankfully, there's only 7 subjects to do.

eating banana cake, its one of my favouritee :D no one's online, makes everything even boring-ier, what to do ? its only7.38 in the morning -.-" and saliha says i sound like a malay, do i ? i dont think so myself ^^ haha, the total cost of the stuff i need to buy, makes up to $125 tell me why secondary school is so expensive ? i dont know, but primary school one, at most $60+ ? secondary school is like twice the price eyh. whatthementos !

update of tuesday, 2 days ago.
went to mom's workplace to help her with the kid's graduation concert. woke up at a amazing 9 o' clock and then headed there, a walk of 25 minutes away from the busstop. and then met mom and the little kids, mom introduced me to her colleagues, some looked at me with disdain because i was wearing a tanktop + a pair of skinny jeans. -.-" i dont see anything wrong with it whadddddddd.
and then i met this crybaby, okays in inference to my previous post, i did say it takes one crybaby to call another one, so im one. this baby's name is Faith Nathania Tan, it sounds nice right her name, but then she cried every other minute, people touch her school bag, cry, and she goes wailing about anything, wails about she unable to open a packet of sweets, ohmygod, i was going to have a uber headache !
and then i met Chanel Si Ting, her dad's Holland-ese and her mom is Chinese, she look so cute ! i have her picture, its in the slide show, i think, because i'm too lazy to upload them one by one. look out for Chanel, i swear you would just simply want to eat her up because she looks so innocent and adorable ! her chinese was near to perfection and i was kinda quite biased against her :x you cant blame me, ~~i like~~ i love adorable kids like her, simply want to bring her home ^^
and then i met Crystal Xue Jing, her dad's Britain and her mom is Thai, cute combination, her eyes are uber big and glittery&&her hair, ohmygod ohmygos ohmygod, her hair is light brown , and its uber curly ! abit like mine when i was young, but she looks simply devine lah. and she likes to follow me around, so cute ! but too bad, she had to leave half-way, because she only attends half-day care.

and then the concert thingy was held at " grassroots club " somewhere near yio chu kang, god, so far, then the little kids ran around like crazy because they were excited, tough day for me, had to help mom the make-up stuff and hold some little kids, but pretty much alright. had to change their diapers for them, wahaha, it stinks real badly, but funny it felt squashy, melissa stop it, you're being disgusting.

enough of blogging for now, shall go get my school books now. tata <3 style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">i just came back from buying school books, freaking heavy and walked my way home, stupid brother doesn't want to give me my money, and how ? i only have like what $10+ when i'm supposed to have $60+, AMOS CHUA, you better not sleep yet, give me my money first okee.
wait why am i talking about money !? okee random, dickson just came over, asking me if i want to go have breakfast with them, dickson says i have to. yay ! i guess i'll have a good breakfast soon (: yay !.
bfie i love you <3
melissa chua is back from breakfast, and this post is uber long because i keep typing.
anyways, after breakfast, in which is like the 1st time in 184523065484876 years, brother brought me out. we had fun and laughed quite alot. and the car dickson drove in, cool siole, we blasted the musik so yeahs.
" you know i'm a hot hot shortie but you dont know me, back off from me oh !"
i absolutely dig this song. whoots !

this is what darryl messaged me ;
" you go beach, dont fall inside the sea eyh, if not the next time i go cruising, i will see you floating around and staring at me "

darryl, you are random. HAHA. anyways, after breakfast, brother & dickson drove me to school to get the school book stuff, then came home here. and here i am typing out this uber long long post for today ^__^
going to meet bfie soon, cant wait, first date we're going to the beach :) yay ! melissa stop blogging for now !

long post

2007-11-21T19:41:00.000+08:00

dont want to turn out like some people, i shall blog from now on, almost everyday,
introducing facebook

This is Mekal ( our baby made by me -.-" )

This is Goreri ( my baby with Maliah )

This is Lisa ( my baby with him. )

this is Edena ( my own baby. )

Facebook is cool yo, tried it after NCC camp, because ms wong told ms shelia about it, guess it would be pretty fun (: and it is ! i like my babies, their cute aren't they.

" abt nadiah, 1/1 they say she very chio

den abt radiah, didnt hear as they talk in malay

den melissa

den irfan say

wad u all think abt her

den rahman say cry baby lah!

den after dat the corporal who talk abt the marching thing

'his name is hakim but he make us call him kimiko'

hakim say 'yah lah juz like her ex'

den look at irfan

haha

den irfan say yah loh "

i dont deny im a crybaby, but at least, come on, dont make everything sound as if its my fault alright, so what if im a crybaby ? FYI , its my own problem right, you think im some dumb freak who cries all day all night long ? no im not, i do cry more frequently compared to others, i dont deny that, but at least, do you have to mother-fucking say to all NCC boys ? you make it sound as if what ? you dumped me because i cried alot, but listen up, who did i cry for ? i cried because of you. okays hear that ? loud and clear ? so you have no ass of a business to call me that, tell me when you never ever cried, when you were given birth, didn you cry ? come on, i steered clear of your way, i never went into your way. IRFAN HAKIM you can go on, saying. whatever. FYI i dont care, i hate you to the coree. i wonder why i ever steaded with you, yucky. i regret seyh, eyyeeer !

facebook is awesome yeahs, had loads of fun on it, hugging people, feeding my babies. hahas.

i'm a facebook cadet.

video

2007-11-20T21:09:00.000+08:00

NCC camp

2007-11-19T19:49:00.000+08:00

NCC camp was slackish this time round, compared to the March camp. a total of 3 days 2 nights, it was a awesome blast.

DAY 1

changed into NCC number 4 which looks like the army uniform, then had foot drills and a test, the test was horrible, Jean checked the attire, nails and all, i think i've got a pretty rough mark, because all commands were given in bahasa melayu, i couldn understand. together with the footdrills test and the attire check, i've got 31/50, the lowest among the other part A, horrible yeahs. the highest was 48/50.

kerblakang pusing ~> turn 180 degrees from stop, going CHECK TLV BANG, and continue marching, last bang lands on right leg.

behenti ~> BANG BANG BANG, last bang lands on right leg.

tukalangka ~> tukalang, ka, BANG, lands on right leg, and then continue marching.

then lunch and dinner had curry chicken, for 2 days, oh god, totally so unappealing, yucky, practically didn eat at all, so yeah then had groaning and all, gastrics acted up on me. shit. then night time had night walk with Azlin and Mardiana and some sec 2 NCC guy, god it was scary, Azlin saw something, and i was crying all the time, it was freaking spooky, and i hate Ahmad, scared me and the rest by rolling out a fire-extinguisher and then jumping out from the staircase. i cried like shit seyh. night duty did with glen and benedict, went around with dumbo ( my elephant soft-toy ). until got paotohh-ed by kelly, she's in table tennis. act chi0 only. eeyhherr.

DAY 2

went for dragon boating, had to take care of the NCCians valuables because wrist was injured, then got sun-tanned, ankle, t-shirt and shorts have 2 skin tone, yucky. Syafiqah has 2 tones under her eyes, i bet zameerul would love it. HA, okays im being mean. SORRY ! wait, i cant be bothered typing anymore.

parents & its over.

2007-11-15T21:13:00.000+08:00

are one fugging lot of people, they scold you for the damn well reasons they use to defend themselves with. they scold you because your friend is rude, they scold you because your friends are your friends, they are happy only when you have no friends. ugh fug fug.

its best we both take a break from each other. you and me are 2 very different individuals, you hate elmo, i love it so much, i like slanted photos, you hate them to the core. i like slanted fonts, you dont, i hate maple to the core, you love it so much. i wake up late and stuff. we're too different..
me and you, 2 different individuals, we cant be togther.
iem sorryy..

its over..

left-hander

2007-11-13T22:07:00.000+08:00

whoot i'm a left-hander for the day, hahas, oh yeah, right-wrist is sprained, fug.
because skating that time fell down then it got swollen, so i cant skate in the mean time, cant go dragon boating, best of all, no need go shooting. i've got a MC for that, yo ! realised my posts are getting shorter and shorter, hmpmh. this thursday going for class outing ! then after that going to nabil's chalet. then friday going for nabil's chalet again. 2 days ? and then NCC camp ! i bet its going to be fun (: but then there's like freaking lotsa of things to pack. and i cant do much stuff, doctor says i have to rest my wrist moree, but no way ! i want my blog to live, even though its's not being tagged, ha, i dont caree.

today went out with, karkheng, michael, li xuan, laura, sofia, sophia and vanessa (: had lunch at KFC once again, its my common hangout spot already, then we walked around and stuff.. michael was being all disgusting and yeahs, yucky, oh karkheng spat at me and sophiaa, kheng arh, learn some dining etiquettes ! and then me and vanessa decided to pangseh the rest, in the end, we got pangsehh-ed -.-" in the end, laura messaged vanessa say " i tell you a secret, you got pang sehh-ed ! " hahas, its not a secret laura (:

who is bored ? MELISSA IS BORED !
toodles <3>

VICKNESH

2007-11-12T17:16:00.000+08:00

(IN YOUR MEMORY ; VICKNESH SINGARAM

1994-2007

from 2000, you've been my friend, laughing along with me, making fun of people with me, you've been my good friend, since that first day of school, we've been friends, we had fun together, we made friends together, you were one of my first friends in primary school. 2004 i transferred, that 4 years of friendship, i would treasure them well, thanks for being there for me since the start of p1, thank you so much, i knew you since kindergarden, since kindergarden !? i still have your photo, i miss you vicknesh, may you return home to god where he will shower all his love on you. you are missed by all okays, dont worry (:

we drifted apart since then, 28 august 2004, i left coral and went to loyang, we still talked once in a while, till now 2007, we've not been that close as we were in primary school. i thank you again, for the wonderful fun times we shared.

VICKNESH,
may god be with you,
may god end all your sufferings,
may god make you happy and healthy,
wish you have a better afterlife from now on.

rest in peace,

121107

i'm sorry for all i've done,
i'm sorry for the troubles i've caused you in p1 when you stood up for me,
may you be a happy-go-lucky and cheerful person once again.

i cant stop crying, i cant believe you passed away, i just cant, you left without a word, i didn know until faiz told me, until syafiqah told me, i saw you 2 days ago, you were with your mom, and your sister i think, you said hi, i said hi back too, why didn you say bye to me at that time? you just celebrated deepavali, god, i'm so sorry. i want vicknesh back, but he's gone, gone forever, vicknesh. vicknesh please visit my blog, i have so much to tell you, but i didn treasure time, i took it for granted, i'm sorry. i just cant believe that you left without a word, i cant...

no matter what, it has become a fact that i cant change, no one can, i have to accept it, i must accept it, oh well, my memory will always have you.

what hurts the most

2007-11-11T23:00:00.000+08:00

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok
But that's not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin' to do
It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I'm doin' It
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
Not seeing that loving you
That's what I was trying to do
Ooohhh....

damn you battleon, because of you i cant bloody log in to play. and the whole day i have to be only on MSN, okays, wait, i sound pathetic. anyways, i'm freaking bored at this point of time, darryl has gone to sleep already, xavier is combating 10+ people on MSN, oh gosh, i wish i'm experiencing that now, because boredness can lead to crappyness. darryl promised to sing me a song tomorrow, darling you promised arhh. and karkheng is ignoring me too. okays, today is a bad day. the whole day listen to only one song - what hurts the most, rascal flatts.

it reminds me of my time with ryan, he always lsitened to this song too. but this time listening to me, makes me cry.. suddenyl feel so emotional, wth -.- ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ. i told you i'm random. dear blog, i'm sorry you're the one to take it crappyness, other than darryl, who has endured my crappyness for 2 days already. bleahs, back so hurts, sat in front of the computer screen for 1 full day already, 11 in the morning till now, and still counting. muahahas.

feel like sleeping but then.. nevermind, shall not sleep until i wish karkheng a happy bdae (:
bleahs, now shall go cook some food to feed my groaning tummy, hahas, haven eaten much from the whole day.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OH KAR KHENG (:
wish you smile and be happy always <3
once again, happy birthday k0r ! you're one year older again !

~~seriously, mapling i know is fun, but then~~
your gf is on msn with you,
thanks for at least some time stopping to see if i did say anything.
i dont like smsing much,
my fingers hurts and i dont like it.
thats why i dont always reply you.
tell me, when my birthday ?
tell me, whats my favourite song ?
my birthday is 13 march.
my favourite song is no one by alicia keys.
tell me whats my favourite colour ?
its green, red, grey, white and blue.
in simple,
you dont really much know me that well.
take the initiative ?
i did.

sleepless nights

2007-11-11T12:33:00.000+08:00

i'm bored, period. currently MSN-ing darryl darling (: last night slept at 3, today morning woke up at a bloody 11.30. curse you Nabil, didn have to call me so many times just to ask me go your chalet right, messaged me so many times somemore.. you dont want to sleep, other people wants to sleep one yeahs ? my little battleon account is growing, yayness ! jonathan kor arh, dont play maple lerh lahhs, boring lehhs, i want my sleep. anyways, go or not to go for Nabil's chalet ? feel like going but then lazy to go.

my life is very boring so i shall not update on stupid stuff like my little battleon, last night talked to maliah on the phone :D AMAN GUPTA , rude guy lah you, was about to install my web-cam just for you, then you had to bloody log off, hmpmh, you're on probation (: oh and, KHENG k0r k0r arhh, elmo has no asshole, i mean he does, but LIANGXIAN di di arhh, you'd better not touch my elmo wors, its my baby norr, dont touch big bird either, big bird's my wedding symbol (: hahas.

XAVIER di di arhh, dont worry, i'm taking your advice, hahas, go out will careful derhs, okays this is pure randomness. anyways, even is elmo and big bird has no asshole, i'm happy with them having no asshole, you 3 sick0s, both are my bao bei horrs, you guys dont try install assholes for them. hmpmh.

skipping lunch (: skipping breakfast (: darryl darling is asking me to go play maple with him, but i dont want. hahas, darryl darling, sorry today cant go out with you wors, iem too lazy to leave my house, hahas, feel like rolling about the house in my chair lehs. hmpmh, tomorrow got tuition already, i'm so sian to go, but for him, go bahhs.

listening to rascal flatts, what hurts the most, ohmygod, its so niceeeee (: thanks you so much KHENG k0r k0r ! mei mei love you. SPOMO ROCKS 333333333333333 TIMES. thanks BENEDICT ERZI for pei-ing me last night until 3, hahas, mommy so loves you <33

enough of thanking, darryl darling has officially gone to play maple, i hate maple.
okays, toodles <3
i love you !

a new beginning

2007-11-10T10:44:00.000+08:00

a new monster appeared in my life (: and his name is teddymonster :D ahahs, and i shall call him that ! a new beginning, 9/11/07 <3 hm, that sounds kinda familiar, hey its the 9/11 bombing in US ! okays, that is very weird. anyways, last night tuition was alright, not as boring as i predicted. so yeah, kinda had fun in tuition, 18 people filled the class !? so quesy ! then i saw teddymonster (: i dont know why, but then he keep looking at me -.-" then my class bryan was sitting beside him, so i messaged bryan asking whats his name, then he mesaged back teddymonster's number -.-" i also never ask lohh.

hahas, then in the end, smsed teddymonster (: then ended up him being my teddymonster :D wheet :} he's caring, nice and all, i think he's reading my posts, ahhaas, then nevermind (:today was okays, tuition and stuff, i miss teddymonster :( he's currently lying on his bed, trying to sleep, yet being messaged by me. i know i'm mean. but gosh, is he one horny little monster. HAHAS. found someone like me ^^ , but only sometimes. hahas. tomorow going to bugis shopping with mommy and daddy ^^ i want to get my crayon blue skinnies babe !

anyways, i'm a successful class 2 dragon slayer (: yay !, haziq, beware, i'm catching up ! hahas, okays thats pure randomness, dont feel like blogging anymoree, shall go play my beloved battleon now ^^
toodles <3

the boredness

2007-11-08T23:03:00.000+08:00

played battleon for the past 4 hours (: after going out with nabil && aizat, for 1 1/2 hour, i went off to meet daddy and mommy go compass point shopping (: bought only a black shorts -.-" because no more XS sizes for me already, darn, all shops only got M. so cant fit in. i so wanted that green shirt, hahas, but no small, ugh, MELISSA CHUA YOU SHOULD EAT MORE AND GROW FATTER ! but i dont wannt grow fatter.. i want to grow taller.. i'm vertically-challenged (: and i shall win :] hehehs (:

and then came home in a taxi -.-" bought too much stuff. mummy's nagging at me to go sleep. but i'm not sleepy at all, &&& tomorrow have to wake up early again -.-" ugh sick. i want to sleep in lah, but then there's loyang primary's traders day (: yay ! shall go bully my little juniors, alright, i'm not that evil. hahas. realised my blog's dying shit. hahas. might take it down lah, but then aiyah, nevermind :D

screwed blogger.

2007-11-08T13:06:00.000+08:00

blogger is screwed.
HAPPY DEEPAVALI !!
to my indian friends (:

thanks for showing that bit of concern towards me,
thank you so much.
thank you oh so much,
i was crying when i said i miss you and
you said you dont know.
but i instantly stop crying once you
said you do care (:
and that i'm more than a friend.
that cheered me up.
i will be independant, i wont be dependant and stuff.
i know you go for independant girls.
so i want to be independant,
and so far, i am, just that sometimes, i break down and cry.
takecare of yourself yeahs (:

finally creamo came online, i talked to him for a short 20 minutes i guess, he was watching lost, some survival show, pardon me that i dont know whats it about, i rarely watch the tv, so yeahs, he says he's going to work already, hope he take cares of himself well, he's going to buy , " as i lay dying " the cd before going to work, hm.. i shall ask him what CDs he wants. hahas. before he went offline, he told me to take care of my health, and that he cares. at least he told me he cares, thats enough for me (: i literally smiled when he said that :]

hm, Jean came back again, and at 2 i have to meet Nabil and Aizat at the block opposite school, we're going to downtown east :D hahas, to check out the chalet availibility. 1/7 might be having a chalet (: that is if there is space. and after that i'm going to compass point ! hahas, mommy says they have nice tube dresses there, shall go there to check them out (: then after seeing the chalet stuff might book it or not, see the price first, Nabil's dad is paying first i think, then those who are going, bring an amount to pay Nabil's dad. a very very big thank you to Nabil's dad (:
THANK YOU ^^

fatal attraction

2007-11-07T17:29:00.000+08:00

i'm fatally attracted to the elmo soft toy at " more at words ", its so cute, i swear i'm getting a elmo shirt one of this days, hahas, i'm running a fever, stupid fever, stupid flu. nevertheless, today is fun (: Jean appeared again, posing as me -.-" thats a rather lowdown thing to do, look for yourself.

7 Nov 07, 11:32

Jean: I'm tired lah watever

7 Nov 07, 11:31

melissa: Hey look at me guys i'm ahorndog and a horn*****.I am dumb.I dig my nose and i always eat the dirt.I yearn for sex

7 Nov 07, 11:30

Jean: horn dog

7 Nov 07, 11:30

Jean: xavier is a third party horn dong

i find it rather amusing, firstly, i never type with a capital letter at the start of any of my sentences, other than names. secondly,why continue spamming people when you say you are tired, yourself, rather contradicting yourself Jean. i dont know what else do you want, but a big thank you for letting me have something interesting to do rather than empty blogging about my boring little life.

its so obvious that you yourself posted that tag from supposedly " melissa " , i just came home, and i tag with my name in CAPITAL LETTERS. so yeahs, brush up on your eye skills, want to fake also fake properly can ? but i dont self-degrade myself, i have self-respect. and please, dont drag my friends in, please, have some bloody conscience or self-consciousness, they're just standing up for me, oh gosh, why am i saying all these to you ? you wont even bother or care, heartless thing.

FEVER AND FLU AND SORE THROAT
gosh i feel terrible, with the headaches and lower abdome pain, my hyper-ness is draining away day by day, day 2 of SICKKY is here, and then today went out with mich, kheng, and gilbert. it was freaking cold, and then we walked around and stuff, mich blanja-ed me a strawberry sundae, hahas, thanks mich! but most were eaten by kheng :D hahas, if i ate moree, confirm i'd have tummyache already lahh.

after that went to simei to pay tuition fees, its so like freaking expensive shit, $ 300 for 1 month + deposit, shithead people, increase the fee until so expensive. i'm boredd, period. tummy's groaning for food, i want food, i want food, i want food, i want pizza, i want hawaiian pizza !! gosh, i'm like some food monster, hahas, food food food !!

~~gosh, i haven talked to~~ creamo for such a long time,
cried to sleep, :(
oh well, i should have expected this state of treatment, avoidancy,
long ago, too blind i guess, sorry i'm typing a emo post today,
i want to give up on him, but my heart doesn want to, i cry over him.
its me, my own stupidity, my own one-sided thing.
iusdbfiusbdfijbsubfun times of i miss you.
it all dont matter,
if you could talk to me,
comfort me,
that things would be alright,
that things are fine,
that you'll be there for me..
i miss you.
i need you.
i'm unclear if everything,
zilch goes on in my mind.
i wont put pressure on you,
take your time,
i'll be here waiting for you,
always :)
i love you.

time

2007-11-07T10:48:00.000+08:00

is spent on reading a book named " my story ",first time so semangat in reading it, hahas, the story captures me straight, even those its a non-fiction book, which means a biography, its awesome. at a time span of 5 minutes i have to complete this post because there will be a scheduled outtage at 11a.m, frankly i DO NOT know what the heck is that.

eating cake makes time pass faster, why ? no idea, btw, i dont know how my geography teacher mrs tan found out about my past -.-" she said it was the sec 3s who told her about it, darn. how in the world did they find out ? i have zilch idea. perhaps the psychic thingy ? oh well, sec 3s are smart, in their own way, like they study A maths and all, i highly doubt i can do A maths, its hard, i can barely pass my maths, and the thriple science ? at most, i would do, is biology and psychics, dont know why, but i find both easier to understand, other than chemistry, oh well, wait another 2 years, and i'll knwo what i can do already :)

meeting karkheng, mich, sofia, sophia and fiona in 1/2 hour's time, whoot ! going to go eat lunch with them, then have to to go simei, to pay some bills, tuition fee i think. hahas, this sunday going to wild wild wet with brenda :D yay ! hahas, i miss that place, last went there was with my cousin, other than that, no one is willing to go with me.

tata <3

sun shinee

2007-11-06T22:08:00.000+08:00

today woke up at a very *eye opening* 11 o' clock. its early for me, being a late waker, like as usual 2 or 3. then freshened up and met with benedict, my erzi / son :) he wore pink ! just like me :} hahas, call that telepathy !

and then walked to school with benny to meet mustaqim to get the NCC camp paper, inventory or something. came home 2 hours later, okay its a boring holiday life i lead, then slept again -.-" sleeping is a good way to spend time, hahas, and then came online here to chat and spend more e time :] kinda boring today, haikay said creamo was online just now, but in mine, he wasn, so he blocked me. yeahs. oh well.

what mattered most, wasn given at all, so the rest dont actually matter, i'm eff-ing running a fever here, and he didn even show concern, even as a friend. does other's concern matter that much even though he doesn care, i think they dont matter as much.

hope creamo ate his lunch and sleeps well for tonight, with his job going on and his studies still, oh well, i'm holding on to a small mini hope, or maybe no hope at all. wish he knew how much i cared, but he wont.

wish you knew how you mattered to me,
wish you knew how much your concern would matter to me,
even a " are you okay ? " would just bring smiles,
but you wont know,
i miss you,
i miss the old happy you,
not saying you changed but how you treat me,
is different.
dont like me, just say it, all truth hurts.
i can take it, its alright, just tell me.
a clear cut answer would do.
say you treat me more than just a friend,
that concludes 100+ possibilities.
i'm not psychic, i dont know what you really mean.
show some care or concern ?
even as a friend ?
as a best friend ?
oh well, i'm still here standing.

SPAMMERS ?

2007-11-06T20:42:00.000+08:00

One reason of having a tagboard is to observe and realise how ignorant some people really are. (whoever you are out there.)
no offense, but i am so free now, i've decided to flame you. :D
Come on, if you really hate me that much come talk to me.
i'm sure we'll work things out. dun be a loser and sit behind the computer screen and insult me coz i wont know who or what hit me. it only goes to show how lifeless you are coz you have either.
1) no friends
2) no life
3) no brain
If you dun wan to see how bad my posts are.
you can 1) stop reading.
2) send an email to blogger.com to delete my blog
3) get a life.
No intention to be mean to whoever that is, but seriously, you criticize my blogging, you flame me on my board. Why in the world are you even looking at it?If you feel like you wanna flame me on my board somemore, wait! listen to me. i could give you a suggestion.Since you dun have a real life or whatsoever, you could get this.
The game of life.You could make believe and pretend you actually have a life in this game how cool is that. OH, and the last time i checked at amazon.com, it only goes for a cheap price of US $8.99. Woah. NOW you can spend your time learning how to have a life and less time wasted on torturing your eyes by looking at my blog.

copy and pasted from someone's blog.
goes to show how low spammers can get.

Hey Jean,
had you have your share of fun ? oh, play " the game of life " i did nothing to you, not even mentioning i even know you, i dont. so who gives you the right to come critise me ? so what if i did scold Sabrina ? i was standing up for Maria, as you said, you were standing up for Sabrina, but just now Sabrina already said sorry and said she'll not go dissing people off already, and who are you now to diss me ? your friend said sorry already, things are settled already, still not happy ?

So what if i had a ugly boyfriend, who in the world are you to critise someone of their looks ? who in the world are you to critise how other's choices ? look in the mirror, i'm sure you're not some drop-dead gorgeous girl, i'm not, i dont deny, but you ? you act as if you're some hot chick. you love someone not because of their looks, you love them because of their character and personality, from how you were saying stuff, i can infer you're some materialistic bitch okays. and guys dont like that, i'm giving you a piece of advice here, take it or leave it.

i'm fed-up with bitches like you, thinking the world of yourself, dont come bloody spamming my tag-board with your stupid dumb shit english when you dont know how to spell properly, not mentioning even how to make sentences properly. i bet you failed your english, badly. oh well, girl, go read more storybooks, they'll improve your english real loads. and oh, you're free to continue spamming my blog, if it seems fun to you, go ahead, more to come, i think you're going to be invisible to me and whoever that comes to my blog, i dont mind, life carries on as usual.

your tags dont mean anything, go ahead if you wish, i welcome you :)
and btw, your definitions of horndog does NOT make any sense at all, you see, with the word " horn " it means there's something to do with horn, but noo. and with the word " dog ", it means there's something to do with dog ?

" Jean: hi,im a total bitch .and i hold cum with my mouth all day long that at the end of the day the cum turns blue "

it doesn make much sense right ?
-.-"

tadaa <3

BEST FRIENDS

2007-11-06T17:06:00.000+08:00

after reading someone's post, i decided to talk about it.
since it affected my blog as well, anonymous can read about it too :}

BESTFRIENDS
why do some of us have best friends and no matter what, after fights or quarrels, we'll still be best friends ? because we tolerate each other, we accept the flaws, we understand whats going through, we know whats the aftermath if we aint friends. bestfriends, in another word, soulmates, through time and experience, we learn to treasure one another, undertstand that even being best friends, it aint meaning the only friend.

so what if your best friend starts hanging out with someone new, the jealousy might arose but think about it slowly ans carefully, its your best friend's choice who she wants to hang out with, who the heck are you to tell her not to hang out with that new friend of hers ?

i read someone's blog, lets name her : Lily.( fake name )
Lily had 2 best friends, Polly and Zena.
One day Zena became close friends with Yana.
And Lily was angry at Yana for stealing away her best friend ; Zena.
Lily told Yana to apologise to her and Polly for stealing away Zena, Yana didn do so.
Lily then told Zena that if she wants them as friends again, she'd better hang out with Polly and her at school for 1 week to make up for it.

the typical quarrels, is oh so common, but we all learn from it.
i'm not trying to talk like a saint, everybody makes mistakes and i do too. but this type of best friend stealing scene, has happened to me more than once, and i did learn from it.

best friends, are friends who are there for you, who walks into your life when every body else is out. best friends will stay as best friends, one who you can share your troubles and thoughts with, without having to tell her, keep it a secret, because she knows it is a secret that only both of you share.

there's no such thing as best friend stealer, if you trust your best friend, you'll know, you'll never lose your best friend, its your best friend's choice to make more friends, she has her own life too. you cant control who she makes friends with, you cant control who she hangs out with.

this thing did happen to me too, earlier this year. me and maliah turned out to be bestest friends, she has her own friends too, whom i'm not too close with. i have my own friends whom she's not too close with too. but whenever either of us has troubles, we share it with one another too. the best friends stay together, in times of need, no matter what, best friends wont give up each other.quarrels are inevitable, but we learn and 5 minutes later, we are talking over stuff and laughing already. that is why, i love GORI :)

i love maliah because she has been there for me no matter what, even though for some periods of time we do quarrel, i want to apologise for those times, MALIAH THANK YOU FOR BEING MY BESTIE !!
i love syafiqah, nadia and maliah again because they have helped much in my complicated little life, offering those very good suggestions and advices, THANK YOU YOU 3 AWESOME BABES !!
i love karkheng because he's my awesome god brother :) he has offered me comfort and words that calms me down and put a smile on my face always, THANK YOU SHITHEADD !! ( karkheng 's my shithead/ shittie )
i love vanessa because she's my awesome twin and she's there for me when i need some comfort :) THANKS TWINNIE !

if i did miss anyone else's name, please tell me :)
BTW,
3 cheers for,
HADI, JORDAN , BENEDICT, MICHAEL, HE HAN, LIANG XIAN, SHIRLEY, HAIKAL, AZLIN, NABIL, TECK WEE, DANIAL EFFENDE, XAVIER, BRENDA, GWEN, AISYAH && ALL MY GOD FAMILY :)
thanks you guys all for being there for me; i love you guys :]]

xoxo ;
thats all for today <3

GORERI COUPLE DAY OUT (:

2007-11-05T17:32:00.000+08:00

ohmygod,

today's one of the most awesome day ever, except that i was in school uniform, which actually restricted me from doing most stuff.
so yeahs, we took lots of spontaneous photos :)
CREDITS TO MALIAHH :}}

FEESORBET YEAHS !

GORERI YEAHS !

1. went to white sands to have lunch with 2 other boys ; MICHAEL and KARKHENG , at BK ; then mich started some lamo jok about a lady hiding a bomb in her bag -.-" then they ate cheese stick and made another dirty joke : the cheese that was oozing out was .. cum ._.

no idea why but after that they spat out all the cheese, guess it was gross huh ? hahas. and then we walked around, went to the library and crapped. stupid mich and karkheng, pulled my shoe laces until they became weird. hahas. but mich had scratch marks on his thigh and hand, CREDITS TO ME (: hehe.

2. after that they left, leaving me and maliah some girl time -.-" hahas, then we shopped around for accessories and stuff , and yeahs, walked around for quite a while before heading for the beach :D the fun part yeahs !

3. then walked to the beach, bought a mocha drink but it tasted horrible :0 , seriously, so whoever that goes to the beach, dont ever buy the mocha drink, its bad :) then we camwhored and stuff, kinda funny when i post the pictures, had on the contacts so i look weird -.-"

but yeahs, MALIAH ZUBIR, we had fun didn we ? hahas, next time we go again kkays ? but next time i'll wear slippers :) hahas.

ILOVEYOU!

THE SEEKER , the dark is rising :)

2007-11-04T19:53:00.000+08:00

today was a super uber delicious day :] kicked start with the computer screen,
while waiting for someone to come online on msn. :} RONALD came to the rescuee :]
then ate breakfast and waited for maria to come over to my house.
had troubles with the contact lenses -.-"

the left eye had troubles, took 20 minutes to get them on -.- " it kept slipping out ? anyways.
after that went to Tampines Mall to meet ronald.

watched " THE SEEKER " , omg, its so awesome ! i give it a 10 star rating, if there's a 10 star rating.. hahas. but its kinda freaky at times, so yeah.

the theater is 100% freaking cold ! i thought i was going to freeze. ( okays thats abit exaggeratted but yeahs its about that coldness. )

creamo online, offline, online, offline.

* groans * i'm hungryy for food !!
and after that i came home with mariaa because my house keys were with her -.-"
its a fun fun day today :D

okays i shall go find some food lurking in the house :}
short post again !

TADAAAA <3>

tmr's inline skating again :D

might get to see the new instructor jun kiat again :) yay !

~~you told him you're not ready for a relationship.~~
~~i just wanted to know,~~
~~if you liked me or not.~~
~~just wanting to know,~~
~~i wasn saying that right after you tell someone you like him/her,~~
~~you have to go steady.~~
~~no, it aint this way.~~
~~so what if you like someone, it dont mean you have to go steady.~~
~~its until you and the other party llike each other alot,~~
and both are ready for a relationship.
i'm here waiting for you always, giving you the support you need, giving you the advice you need.
even if we cant be togther( which i think we cant ) ,i still want you as a best friend.
yeahs ?
peace to you.
~~just want you to know,~~
~~i like you alot.~~

" you are driving me, but you aint in control of me, i steer the wheel aye :} "
that is just some random shit i came up with :)

this song is so..

2007-11-03T21:44:00.000+08:00

this song so suits the mood i'm in now..
" my heart will go on "
by Celine Dion

i feel like crap now. and i feel crapp-ier now.
just came home from shopping after tuition.
bought a shoe-bag , a book, contact lenses, and yeah lots more stuff.
shopping with mommy is good :]

ohmygosh.
i want to cry already! and i'm watching the video too. its so sad yet romantic. i'm into the oldies once again.. what the hell lah.

creamo
can you just come online ?
talk to me please.
dont give me the cold shoulder.
creamo.
i'm sorry.
please.
just reply one of my sms will do.

you know what.

i think giving up is what i should do.

this all, is just what i think.

this all is a one-sided feeling thing.

this all, is what people say say, stupidity.

but i cant ! i tried hard, to get over him. but i cant. he's the guy that caught my eye. he's nice and all. but i just cant help not liking him. i dont want to give up on him, i wont.

i'm not giving up on you.

i made up my mind, i'm not giving up. but i'm giving him time. oh well. in the mean time, i shall keep my thoughts to myself. he's busy with his job.

anyways.

i met fazli 4/4 i think. he's in NPCC one.

hahas.

on the bus and i saw sebastian and his brother too.

today's pretty much a boring day.

studies physics abit for science tution.

about the molecules of the 3 staes of matter and stuff.

my blog's turning educational already -.-"

solid

- packed closely to one another.

- hence has a fixed volume and fixed shape.

- cannot move around freely.

liquid

- packed not as closely to one another as compared to solid.

- hence has a fixed volume but not a fixed shape.

- can move around but not as freely as gas.

gas

- not packed at all.

- hence has no fixed shape nor fixed volume.

- can move around very freely.

thats all for the educational stuff today.

TADAAA <3

if your going to give me the cold shoulder,

so be it.

i'm not going to beg you.

stupid fever and no one cares !

SATURDAY OUT ~

2007-11-03T15:17:00.000+08:00

time to revive my dead blog.
hahas.
slept at 3 last night.
was chatting on msn with XAVIER
funny shit.
we shared lame jokes.

listening to fallen leaves by billy talent now :]]

just came back from guitar lesson.
smsed creamo but no reply.
i think he's busy or something.
oh well.

had a dream about shopping spree -.-"
hahas.
like had my own chauffeur and he actually got to drive around the entire shopping center.
and i actually had all the stores's shopping manual, click on it in the car and drive to the store, immediate delivery.
so awesome !

the car is a lamborgini (:
nicee.
a hot red lambo.

oymygod,
i swear i'm buying one when i'm older.
HAHAHA.

i'm supposed to go for tuition now.
but like who cares -.-"
daddy haven asked me to go out yet.
so yeah. afterall, tuition class is one word : BORING !
and and and, when i go for tuition, its mostly crapping.
ohgawd, sofia's not going to be there today :(
sad lah kays.
got no one to camwore with me.

oh well,
watch out XAVIER !
your're going to be my camwhore model today :] and until sofia's back for tuition :D

tata <3 color="#663366">haikal and hadi on msn now :D

sad sad life i live

2007-11-02T22:56:00.000+08:00

sad life i live.

i asked in a nice way.
" like me or not "
he asked me not to ask him that.

i'm like miserable okay ? i sound dramatic, but nevertheless, its the truth.
i mean things are just there, i asked friends, they told me different answers.
why cant someone just tell me what is going through his mind ?

i asked again.
" i dont know what i'm thinking. i dont know if you like me or not. i think you dont. its miserable, wanting to know something but yet no matter what, i wont know it. i dont like pressuring people to get answers. but yeah, i dont know what to do. i like you, you know it. i just want to know, if we could EVER be more than just friends. "
he told me.
" well,you see, i really dont know the situation right now,im saying that anything is possible, im not doubting it alright? yeah thats all "

oh well, i sort of got some answers from that ? anyone who can decipher what he really means in what he's telling me ? i guess i was being too straight in telling him huh ?

i asked him.
" was i too straight ? "
he said.
" not really "

i'm drove nuts. MELISSA IS A GONECASE. now i shall wait for that one day when he can tell me what is really going through his mind. oh well.
wish me luck yeahs ?

what i'm wishing now : for his answer to whether he likes me or not.
what i want now : him being happy and cheerful.
what i'm thinking now : he dont want to tell me anything because he dont know too.

he just went offline. oh well, hope he has sweet dreams and a smooth job :] hope he doesn tire and stress himself out.

anyways, yesterday, as i promised to this dead blog, i went to east coast, ate at JUMBO. they've got the best seafood ever ! seriously, and i think its halal too :] i think it is lah. maybe next time can go there to eat with friends :D

i forgot to take pictures of my delicious food ._. how dumb i know. then after that had a slow walk on the beach with daddy, mommy and brother :]] first family reunion in i think 2 months. brother gave me some money ._. hahas. i think he suddenly got conscious that i actually exist. and before we left the house to fetch daddy , he asked if i was in express and then took a picture of me. its weird -.-"

wanted to get some fresh fruits, i have absolutely no idea why there is only 1 fruit stall there, and it was unfortunately, closed.

then before i went there, i went to pasir ris park (: hahas. its a very fun place to go to. wanted to go roller blading but the shop was closed, in the end, double-biked with VANESSA :}}

got wet and cycled around in just socks -.- " VANESSA's sneakers got wet and sandy, mine was just wet. but yeah. its was FUN FUN FUN ! but yeah, sadly, mich didn come because it was too late.

today was boring !

woke up at 2. i know its late. but what do you expect from a lazy girl who just sleeps in whenever she can ? hahas. oh well. then watched some korean drama ^^ , i'm hooked onto it lah :] watched it a 458231790 times already :D but but but, funny, i just dont get sick of watching it over and over again.

i'm now hungry and i'm going to cook some food to satisfy my growling stomach :D

tata <3>

and yeah,

this SUNDAY is going to be fun :] going out to watch movie with ronald and maria ^^.

i'm going to match-make them lah :} ssh :xx its a secret !

hahas. and next sunday going to wild wild wet with cousin ^^ hahas. whoot !

planning to go ice-skating with VANESSA and the rest too :]

some day also planning to go watch movie with SYAFIQAH ; NADIA ; MALIAH

BRATZ ( the movie ) and go beaching after that :]]

i have a shoutout !

SITI SYAFIQAH ; NADIA NASIR AND MALIAH ZUBIR IS MUCH LOVED !!

YEAH, FEESORBETS'S BACK AGAIN :]]

family reunion !

2007-11-01T21:03:00.000+08:00

today had fun with brother !
hahas
he finally came home after 2 months.
damn him.
will blog more about it tmr :D
tata for now <3

day out

2007-10-31T16:49:00.000+08:00

today was hell lotsa boredness :}

don't know what's with the weather nowadays.
it rains so badly,
inline skaters cant skate, archers cant do archery.. ; etc.

went to school with black sneakers :p
no one said anything about needing to wear school shoes for NYAA right ?
anyways.
then assembled already,
crapped with VANESSA TWINNIE.
hahas. then went to canteen for our theory ?!

EW, theory ? ohmygosh.
first thing that came to my mind ?
" the study of inline skating -.-" "

hahas. i know it doesn make much sense though.
why learn about the history ?!?

anyways. we learnt about the different types of skating thingy.
had live demo too !

oh yeah, in my previous post;
this time round,
there was new instructors.
gosh.
his name was JUN KIAT :]

hahas.
then then he looks like the boy next door.
ohmygosh, isn't that cute ?
hahas.

oh well.
back to the same old topic.
we weren't able to skate or whatsoever.
just in the canteen from 8-10

oh that 2 hours were sweet :]]
sat with VANESSA TWINNIE ; KAILUN ; LINDSEY :)

oh so so much fun !
after that we sat there and crapped :))
then BENJAMIN ( our instructor ) pitied those beginners.
while we were having our break ,
they had to do psysical workout -.-"
okays i dont know how to spell that word :p

hahas.
then the sec 3s come to canteen for break;
we were happily dismissed :]

i didn get to see or catch a glimpse of creamo ):

sad. i smsed him.
but sadly, he didn reply.
oh well.
hope he gets the job he wants :]
i'm praying he gets a phone call from the job he wants :)
jiayous creamo !

went to white sands with
TWINNIE again and jamie.
hahas.

jamie cracked alot of cold jokes.
vanessa didn find them funny ;
i dont know why i still laughed like shit.
hahas,
i think thats me.
:p

oh well.
creamo's not on MSN nor is he replying my messages.
how sad.

eyk ,
creamo
just a nickname i give him :]

went home with vanessa and crapped again.
okay vanessa i admit i have short arms :x
hahas.

hahas.
then came online here where
me and vanessa irritated MELVIN ANG
hahas.

he is funny and very dramatic :x
oh gosh,
i'm bitching about a guy.
oh well.
he's nicee and stuff ( i'm lying through my teeth )
hahas.

so yeah.

i swear MELVIN's pissed with me :]
hahas.
like i care lahh.
call me just to ask about someone :x

i'm not as free as you :)

AND
MELVIN ANG is crazy !!

guess what ?
he spammed my inbox.
with 50 " sorry "
and
VANESSA's inbox
with 80++ crap stuff

i seriously think he is crazy and out of his mind.
-.-"
oh well.
he could have put it to better use though.
i sound like i'm using
cheemanology here.
but i'm not :]]
hahas.

yayness

2007-10-29T20:36:00.000+08:00

finally i got to talk to hadi ;
haven talked to him for i guess 4 days ?

yay !
hahas.
anyways,
had our first inline skating course.
oh gosh, the instructor..
how to describe;
cant pronounce english properly,
VERY long-winded,
VERY short-tempered.

other than that,
the instructors are fine.
BENJAMIN ; KENNETH ; RICKY and JEREMY.
BENJAMIN AND KENNETH are young.
like BEN's 25 and KEN's 15 at most ?
while RICKY AND JEREMY are old.
like both about 40+ ?

oh yeah
i got into the pro skaters.
because know how to skate yeah.

and btw,
the gears stink like hell,
i should remember to bring the air freshener on wednesday !
:]

and and and.
i think i might have a chance to see him :]]
yayness !!

and and and.
thank god i didn even fall at all !
how great huh ?
hahas.

sure hope syaf ; nisaa ; flo ; maliah and
the rest of the people,
have fun for the NYAA session!

maliah said their fener training is fun !
well i'm happy for them :]
skating has many people lah.

divided to 2 groups.
the beginners and the novice.
i'm in novice :]]

then BENJAMIN is OUR instructor :D
fun lah he.
he knows how to skat backwards ;
onewheeled;
one legged.

i mean thats pretty pro lah okee ?
i cant even skate backwards !
but he IS no matter what,
still the teacher;
cant compare lahh !

so yeah.
i was grouped with rachel lee 1.9
vanessa ( twinnie ) 1.9
lindsey 1.9

and yeah.
i feel abit like feverish.
and no one cares.

i'm having my next NYAA thing on wednesday :]
yay !

i asked him.
if he likes me.
and he asks why i'm asking.

i bet its a " no " thats why..

i feel so like.. confused.

janan wants me to give him a reply on whether
i would give him a chance.
do what ?
i like another guy lah
but how to tell him ?
i tell him 4-5 times already.
but he dont listen.
ugh.
i'm fucked.
and i'm hungry.
damned.

so sorry

2007-10-28T18:54:00.000+08:00

ssorry about the previous posts guys.
especially to 29126 gang.
especially to florentina.
especially to syafiqah.
especially to nadia.

just want you guys to know.
i'm really very sorry.
to syaf and nad,
i think you guys might have lost your trust in me
for typing out those previous posts.
i'm very sorry.
i want to earn back those trust,
i'm sorry, would you guys give me a chance to redeem myself ?

sorry;
thats the only word i can think of at the moment.

really hope you guys could give me a chance to redeem myself.
you know i do dumb stuff most of the time;
so would you guys pretty please give me a chance to redeem myself ?

i know its going to be hard to earn back your trust and friendship.
you guys might think i'm some bitchy slut now.

i dont know.
but i do know that i want to and i have to earn back
the trust and friendship.

sorry guys.
please.

i'm really
really
really
really
really
sorry ):

2007-10-28T14:17:00.000+08:00

deleted posts.

a very sincere apology whom i had hurt with my words.

sorry.

2007-10-21T16:27:00.000+08:00

its been a while since i last blogged.
might consider tearing this blog down.

no one reads it :]
i had a hair cut.

its bob again.
i think i have a strong addiction for bob hair.
LOL.

i'm weird i know.
cut long then cut short.
the whole year round its like that.

i'm having a tummyache now ):

woke up at 2
left home at 2.30 to go cut hair.
came back at 4

i ate chocolate bar for lunch :]
i know mummy confirm will scold me.
just that i got no appetite.

i want to bite someone now.
RAWR
tata <3
i shall go watch korean drama now.
as what HADI says i can do -.- "

fucking pissed

2007-10-18T13:23:00.000+08:00

enough of photos ?
i'm freaking tired.
skipped school today.
so yeah.
because i'm having a freaking headache.
azlin skipped school too.
hahas.
at least got people skip with me lahh :D
currently talking to bernard k0r azlin and eleen and maria :]
hahas.
i'm really bored.
nothing to do.

anways
with my results,
i aint satisfied.
to me its quite badly done lahh.

tata <3 href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_9w_HIaK095s/Rxb5CHbrM8I/AAAAAAAAAIE/7tBCIhl55yI/s1600-h/fotos...%5B++++++%5D334.jpg">
group photo 3 :)

the group photo 2 !
my face so distorted lahh.
but still everyone looks so pretty and stuff.

the group photo :D i'm like freaking short lah. the winner is the girl and boy in red and blue. me and adli got 2nd :) not bad huh ? hahas.

they look cute :D

at request of nisaa :) she and adli looks coool :]

me and adli :D

i'm nisaa's artwork :D

me and nisaa.
dont know why i look damn weird. hahas.

me and amalina.
i know its heavy on the eyes :x

adli and nisaa.
adli's thing is so short :x

sorry people.
haven been updating.
but at last :]

anways
got back my results already.
damn it lah.

english paper 1 got 38/60
english paper 2 got 31/50
geography got 54.5/100
literature got 33/50
chinese paper 1 got 47/70
chinese paper 2 got 43/70
maths paper 1 got 20/40
maths paper 2 got 21/50
DNT got 29/50
science got 48/100
art got 24/40

i think i didn do well.
so like wth lah kays.

erm.
anyways.
sorry for not posting much.
tata <3

hahas

2007-10-14T14:17:00.000+08:00

the sunnies are the ones i bought.
and the tie is the one i bought too.
i kinda like this picture :]

moree photos.

FRIDAYY day out with the 1/9 people :D

wait.
i want to change blogskin AGAIN.
so tata <3
no moree posts for today ):
hmph.

bored

2007-10-13T14:23:00.000+08:00

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI !

kkays.
for all muslims,
HAPPY NEW YEAR !!.

as you can see.
i'm fucking damned bored.
will blog more when i come back fomr visiting GONGGONG/
* GONG GONG is grandfather is chinese.
haha.s
kkies.
tata DARLING <3

i miss IRFAN HAKIM DAMN ALOT.

fucked up.

2007-10-12T17:28:00.000+08:00

damned.
today so jinxed lah kays.

i lost my wallet at peninsula.
i think.
or is it at city hall MRT there.

today starting was like really good.
i went to WHITE SANDS to meet
afiqah, brandon, and jordan.
then after that meet
michael and he han at TAMPINES.

then we take train go CITY HALL.
ate 1 prata.
quite nice.

after that we all went into a shop.
where michael bought a full new set of clothes to wear.
he han bought a shirt and a hoodie.

eh no.
the hoodie was afiqah buy for he han one.
afiqah so good to he han.
HAHA.

then me and afiqah walk around.
i tried on this green skinny jeans.
colour was not right and the size was too big.
the saleslady i think was pretty annoyed.
eh like wth lah.

then walk walk around.
after that i saw this shop of sunnies.
i bought a RED BIG BIG sunny.
really nice.
the uncle of the shop said it was priced at $12
i fake fake say $10
then he say sell me the sunnies at $10
ho ho ho !
like cool lahh !

then after that i walked around with the rest..
brandon bought a shirt.
that looks like a NCC uniform top.
HAHA.

he says NCC is easy.
wth lah.
go try taking NCC as your cca then.
its FREAKING HARD LOH.

hahas.
then after that bought a RED TIE.
wheet !
the aunty priced it at $8
i got it for $6
LOL.

dont knwo who said i have the potential to
be a haggling aunty in future.
HAHA.
i mean maybe.
but i confirm dont want to be aunty hor.

lols.
then we decided to go to TM.
send jordan back to pasir ris to fetch his sister up
from school.

then came down from MRT.
wanted to give donations to this blind aunty.
then could not find my wallet.

A BLACK MYUK WALLET.
WITH 1 ATM CARD
A NATIONAL LIBRARY CARD
2 FUNKEYS
1 EZONE CARD
$35+ DOLLARS.

GONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE !!!

like fuck lah.
seriously.
k0r k0r bought that wallet for me one.
damn it lah.
its like his first present to me.
i should treasure it.

feel so guilty of losing it.
URGH !

then go make a new ATM card.
and told the library thingy that i lost my card.
and made a lost wallet report to the MRT thingy.

GAH.
jinxed day.
waited 20 minutes for a damned bus.

came home found out furniture in my room was moved around.
i mean like.
WTHHHH !!

anways.
i cant do anything or would do anything to anyone who is rude to me.
i mean like. its your mouth. i cant stop you how you say things.

i remembered once.
i was walking at the staircase there with maliah.
aciddentally almost bumped into a girl and her friends.
i have this habit.
i would say " fuck " for everything.
i think she thought i was saying " fuck " to her.
i meant no harm.
wanted to apologise to her after that.
but then had no chance.
all i want to say is.
SORRY..i didn mean it. seriously.

second post for the day :D

2007-10-11T20:10:00.000+08:00

guess what.
i'm boredd !

urgh.
hahas.
kays i'm kinda cranky now.
blog's kinda dead though.

no tags no nothing.
sheesh.

before exams banned from the computer.
now that i can play it.
i feel equally boredd.
maybe because like too much time to play.

i shall post some interesting stuff here.
hopefully i can find.

now i'm at
trying to find sth nice and entertaining.

no one fun is online.
MICHAEL THONG WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU ?!

darling never sms me too.
i explode bill already lahh.
damn it.

and i dont want to waste my money to buy the damn prepaid card.
i'd rather use the money to buy useful stuff like clothes and stuff.
haha.

i swear some people would kill me.
HAHA.

gah !
i'm dying of boredomm !!
and someone anonymous just smsed me.
asking if i'm MELISSA.
i called back.
no one pick up ?!

like wth lah.
playing uh.
i got no more smses already lah.
urgh.

damn.
i hate it when i HAVE to reply no matter what.
i really DONT WANT to.

damned.
now i'm at
really nothing to do !!!

STUPID FRIENDSTER IS UNDER MAINTAINENCE !!
darling reply me can can ??

boreddd.

2007-10-11T16:41:00.000+08:00

today had ART and DNT
in which means

HALLEJULAH !!
END OF EXAMS. FULLSTOP.
hahas.
kays.
art actually last night i only did 4 pieces.
at least i did hor.
then the 2 hours given,
i do another 4 loh.
so good hor.

then DNT,
i didn really study.
there was a fight in canteen.
not going to talk about it.
DAMN.
i was fucking distracted.
i didn even flip the textbook.
so yeah.
but at least i FLIPPED thru my file loh.
hahas.

EXAMS ended at 12
but then after that got the hari raya thingy.
until 2
i mean it was so like shy shy lah.

had to wear a baju kurong with adli wearing another costume.
ON STAGE !?
then is like.
they play music for about 4 minutes,
the time for us to wear the hari raya clothes.
IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE SCHOOL.
then 1/7 is the first class.
so we go first.
like whatthehell.
they say me and adli is couple.
like wtf lahh.

but no choice.
is on stage.
GRR.
lols.

i told adli sth.
i said.
if he dared to do anything funnny on tuesday.
i shall kick him down the stairs.
then he keep quiet.
i guess that scared him :P

after that went home.
then cooking food to eat,
darling smsed me say want to meet.
then i go meet him lah.
for 1 hour +

hahas.
at where we were seating,
saw nazeer 2/4 and syed 3/1 and sth sth 3/1
i dont know the last guy's name.

hahas.
B taught me maths.
something something COSINE.
HAHA.
i did benefit from it hor.

okays.
finger's tired.
shall blog more tonight.

YAY !
tmr is FRIDAY.
going to peninsula with the people !!
wheet !

i miss sayang <3

OPEN FOR ALL

2007-10-10T19:39:00.000+08:00

OKAY OKAY.
today was okay i guess.
CONGRATS TO SYAFIQAHH !!

wish you guys last damn long kays !
i miss darlingg.
gahh !
anways.
today i only had 1 paper.
which is maths paper 1.
i think i was like paranoid over stuff ?
then i made this damn stupid mistake lahh.

how could anyone be this blur you tell me.
7+4= 10 ?!!!

i knwo its stupid.
wonder what was i thinking.

i finished my paper at 10 lahh.
at least i finished the paper in time hor.
then after that went to the canteen to meet
darling.

i sat at the back of the canteen.
grr.
didn get to see him lahh.
but nevermind.
HAHA.
darling came over for 1 minute then mr singh drove him away.
stupid lah he.

i was doing art.
so called lah.
then michael came along.
then he started talking lah.
hahas.
he so funny :D

then darling ended class at 2.20 lah okay.
so late.
after doing ABIT of art.
went to slack with michael.
in the end decided to go his house play computer.
his house is nice.
and he so DAMN messy lah kays.

after that at 2 i left his house.
michael sent me to the busstop.
hahas.
i made him do so.
down there is damn quiet kays.
then i took the bus back to school.

damned me.
i alighted at the wrong stop.
then had to walk so long way.
wtf lahh.

after that wait for darling.
hahas.
then we walk loh.
so funny sia.

darling says i'm cranky today.
because i never got enough sleep.
but i mean.

i was cranky not because i didn get enough sleep.
i'm used not to getting enough sleep.
but last night i didn get to talk to him at all.
he had something on.
sad lah.

in the end talk with maliah then michael until 12+ i think.
then i sleepy go sleep.

today morning walk with benedict ERZI :D
ERZI means son.
hahas.

we share a close mother-son relationship.
he was there when i broke up with ryan last time.
and i was there when he broke with his ex.

gosh.
hahas.
YAY !
this friday is confirm going to peninsula with
afiqah, michael, he han and darryl i think.
vanessa not sure.
ask karkheng come along he say dont want.
maybe on MONDAY.
which is also no school day.
going to go watch BALLS OF FURY with michael and the rest.

see first.
today i talk alot of crap.
because i cant sms.
and there's not many people online on MSN to talk to.

I miss IRFAN HAKIM.
):
he never sms me.
sad.
i think he having SAHUR now.
kays.
IRFAN HAKIM, i love you !

2007-10-09T14:21:00.000+08:00

all me lahh.

me again.

i actually quite like some of them. hahas.

nice anot ? hahas.

whatthehell am i talking ?
anyways.
i told mummy about me skipping the part B
funny mummy didn scold me lehh.
anwyas.
good lahh.
hopefully this friday can go PENINSULA with michael :D :D
wheet !
hahas.
i want to get back my sim card lah.
prepaid really no more already.
i'm freaking lazy to top it up.
anways.

this friday if i get to go to PENIN with the guys
i want to buy this red tie :D
i like red.
not because i'm an AH LIAN
first thing first.
RED is COOL.
and second thing/
i'm NEVER a AH LIAN.

okay.
i miss darling.
really love him.
the other day break.
the same day patch back already.
i guess we seriously could not NOT miss each other lahh.
hey i DO miss him now still okay.

he had i think triple science..
if i'm not wrong.
after his exams i went to meet him.

then he was with bobo.
people who know bobo will know that
bobo is his nickname.
hahas.

then he went to pick his younger sisters up.
his adek.
hahas.

i'm trying my best to upload this nice nice photo.
i like.
with the necklace that has darling's initials.
and my favourite BATMANN !!
wheet !
next time batman comes to singapore,
i'll get his autograph mans.
hahas.
this shows how obssessed iam about BATMAN.
i'm meaning the real BATMAN
not the nickname BATMAN.

clear already ?
fullyohh !

i dont know how to spell that.
hahas.
learnt it from MALIAAH

FINALLY FEESORBET IS TOGETHER AGAIN :D
FEEchocolate >> NADIA
FEElolly >> SYAFIQAH
FEEcinnamon >> MALIAH
FEEcandy >> MELISSA ( ME )

HAHAS.
wheet !
i love yoo darling <3
bye bye second post of the day :D
i cant wait for next month 16-19
NCC CAMP :D :D
will be seeing darling for 3 days straight.
fooh yohh !
<3
tatas.

fuccck

2007-10-09T10:57:00.000+08:00

fuck !
FUCK FUCK FUCK !
and i thought yesterday paper was okay/
today's science paper is okay too.
but at least i NEVER skip question !!

my science paper is so like dead.
i skipped question 38
didn notice there was a part A and B ?!
FUCK
who the fuck as blur as me never see the question and not do it.
tell me !!

urgh !
i'm so pissed off with myself.
if i was concentrating on the paper and not distracted by something.
i would have done the questions !

shit narhh.
how the hell am i going to face my mommy ?
die die die !!
FRUSTRATEDD LAHH !!

i bet sooner or later i'm going to have a nervous breakdown !
so much stress lahh.

whatthefuckinghelltroubledidigetmyselfinto ?
urghh !!
HOPEFULLY.

i'll pass each sub with a B3
hopefully.

WISH ME LUCK !
<3